Of Gods and Monsters
by St. Ciel
Summary: I'm a killer - a monster. I don't have actual emotions nor do I care for anything. I choose not to keep many friends and I don't waste my time with acquaintances. I am a cold blooded killer – so tell me why I feel compelled to put everything on the line and protect this brat?
1. Skinning

**Disclaimer:** This story is intended for mature audiences only. There are themes of violence from the start and throughout as well as shota and hinted physical and sexual abuse of a minor. It's up to you to decide your own comfort level.

* * *

_Tick follows tock follows tick follows tock._

This is my mantra, my ritual.

_Tick._

I spin the long cylinder piece of metal onto the nozzle of my favorite piece, Colt M1991A1, it's a .45, single magazine – a classic and my fail safe. It works especially well with my silencer and I screw it on to secure it tightly.

_Tock._

Brushing some stray strands of my black hair behind my ear, I secure a feathered mask to my face with the satin ribbons that are attached to it. I 'borrowed' this mask and a cloak to cover me from a patron who was carelessly carrying them outside – he won't have any need of them now.

_Tick._

Making my way into the decadently decorated main reception hall, I see large drawn ruby red drapes that cover the windows, the only light is from the huge ebony drop crystal chandeliers that hang from the ceiling, they are illuminated with lit tapered candles – _how antiquated and Victorian, _I scoff silently to myself. Dropping my kit bag down by the wall, I use my foot to slide it under a side table, keeping it safe. I blend in with the rest of the crowd, which is quite easy to do. Everyone here is shrouded in cloaks, and elaborate masks hide their faces. Anonymity is key, especially given what is on offer here.

It looks as though the bidding has already gotten underway. Mingling through the herd, I spot my mark; a tall man with slicked back brown hair, his suit stretches around his wide waist as he stands at the podium, gesturing towards a large cast iron cage. I can't see what's inside it but after my extensive research on this guy I know it must be a child.

This is something that I have learned: the world is a dark place.

It's full of injustice and violence. Hatred, corruption and greed – but that's where I come in.

I'm a killer and a monster.

I'm callous and lack the basic emotions that you may take for granted. All I know is what I see – the hurt and the pain, the anguish and torment. Of course I'm sure there are better emotions; happier ones but I haven't seen them. Those who come to me already have their faces twisted in sadness and desperation. You see, I don't need anything as frivolous or useless as feelings or emotions, especially to do what it is that I do. To care about someone is to allow them to have a hold on you, to control you and that is something that I don't need binding me.

Besides, you don't need me to care; you only need me to do my job and nothing more.

I know my role, I'm the one you turn to when you have exhausted all your avenues and when you've got no one else to turn to. Don't worry, you can call on me and I will take care of it for you. If you can't count on anyone else, it's fine - because you can always count on me. That's what I offer, I deliver justice and retribution for those who have been let down by the law, those who can't get satisfaction from the system. However, I only take on jobs that I find truly worthy of my time and my talent, something I can sink my teeth into, something delicious and satisfying.

I am very good at what I do and no one escapes me so it has to be worth it.

I deliver each time – _every time._

Although I may be a monster and a killer, I don't kill without a reason or indiscriminately, I have a rigid and strict set of rules that I abide by. As much as I enjoy killing, _and I do_, I only take the life of those who truly deserve it, and those who have skirted the system, thinking they are above the law. This means that I must do my homework, I have to ensure that each person fits into my criteria without any shades of grey. So, I take my time, I research, I prepare and once I feel satisfied, I carry out my plan. Which leads me here and to that man on the stage.

Yes, the world is a dark place, full of people just like this man – who is soon to be eradicated.

"What say you for this prize specimen?" He calls out. This man disgusts me; even his voice makes me sick.

"One hundred thousand pounds!" Someone behind me calls out.

"One hundred thousand pounds to the gentleman at the back? Do I hear two hundred?"

I maneuver myself closer to the stage, _closer to him_ and now I'm right in front, waiting for the appropriate moment. I can't do it in front of all of these people, too many witnesses.

"Five hundred thousand!"

"Thank you madam, five hundred with you, six hundred to the room? Come on, just look at him – he's worth double."

Shoot now or wait? What to do, what to do? If I shoot now, I would have to wipe out the entire room or take out a small few and get out as fast as I can. Can I get out that quickly? Probably. _Shoot now or wait?_

"One million pounds!"

_Oh, fuck it – just shoot the cunt._ I conclude.

I raise my arm in the air, everyone was so engrossed in the auction that they barely register the fact that the thing in my hand is not a bidding paddle and I take my aim.

_Tock._

"Two million pounds!" I shout to get his attention and just before his mouth drops open – I pull the trigger. The recoil sends me back slightly as one bullet cleanly enters the center of his forehead. He falls to his knees, dead and the room starts to spiral into chaos. I stand my ground as people scramble past; their screams and shouts fill the air.

I love the smell of fresh blood, especially as it splatters to the ground and sprays over the walls in such a beautiful pattern. Blood, the scent of beginnings and subsequent endings – I inhale deeply – filling my lungs with the sweet iron fragrance, I can't help myself, it's an addiction and I need my fix. Taking aim, I hit a few more attendees as they jostle out and the room starts to empty quickly. I do it for the smell but I can't help but smile broadly as I watch their bodies tumble lifelessly to the ground with a heavy thud. There's something about death and slaughter that intrigues me and entices me, I wouldn't say it turns me on but it is a wonderful feeling that comes over me. From the moment I aim and my index finger just hovers over the trigger – to the final moments of the pull and the shot fired. Watching that last bit of life in their eyes go out, I think I would describe it as nothing more but pure bliss.

I know that I have approximately thirty-five minutes or so to get out and away from here before the police arrive. I move to the wall and press my back flush against it, unscrewing my silencer and popping it back into my pocket, watching as the stragglers exit and ensuring that there is no one else. Glancing at my watch I realize - I'd better leave. I have plenty of time but why chance it?

Quickly unfastening the button at the top of my throat, I take off the cloak and fold it up neatly, reaching under the table; I grab my bag and shove the folded cloak into it along with my gun and the mask. I'm taking them with me to dispose of it later – taking care to leave no trace.

It's time for me to take my leave as I start to walk out towards the door; well my job here is done.

"_Please_..."

I hear a weak voice call out in the shadows. I assume it's one of my many victims here, as they lay dying. I tend to take measured steps and procedures when I kill but sometimes – like now, I enjoy myself a little too much and indiscriminately take aim, without ensuring a perfect, clean kill.

"_Please... help me. Will you help me_?" The voice calls out again. It's too innocent sounding to be one of my victims; it's small and weak. I'm intrigued as to what this could possibly be, so, I follow it. I can hear the heels of my shoes crunch and click over the concrete and broken glass of champagne flutes as I wander towards the small voice. Arriving at the large cast iron barred cage on top of the stage, I see a small hand reaching out towards me.

"_Oh_?" Is all I utter as I try to see the voice that is calling me from the shadows.

My job was to take out Viktor Nogoyev for child trafficking, he ran a ring in his native Kyrgyzstan that collected children from all over Britain and Eastern Europe and sold them into slavery at the best price. A woman hired me; her daughter was taken from their village in Georgia and sold. She'd traveled to London as she heard that this was the last place her daughter was seen. The job was interesting to say the least and so I carried out my due diligence, as I do with every job. I watched, surveyed, monitored, and took notes but unfortunately, after all of my work – I found that her daughter had already died, beaten to death by the man that bought her. With this news, she hired me again, this time to take the life of the man who took her Sonjas'. I was happy to do it, after all my work investigating him – this man fit my criteria to the letter.

This child here must have been what they were bidding on when I came in.

"Are you God?" The question was ridiculous, though innocent enough. However, it is still something that causes me to chuckle slightly.

"_God?_ There is no God here, only me." I answer bluntly.

"Then... then are you a demon?" Two small hands reach out from the darkness and wrap nimble fingers around two iron bars.

"I have been called such and I have been called worse." I shrug, "What is your name?"

"Ciel." He answers calmly, completely un-phased by our bizarre dialogue. "Ciel Phantomhive."

Ciel Phantomhive? _Oh yes_, I've heard of this case. It was strange, two people, Vincent and Rachel Phantomhive were killed and their mansion in Hertfordshire was burned down. Their twelve-year-old son disappeared without a trace, presumed dead as well and it's been three months since anyone has heard anything. There was no ransom note or apparent reason for the murders. The police were stumped – no surprise there, if they were any good at their job then there would be no need for someone like me. In any case, the remaining family members have offered up a handsome reward for his return but he never returned. Imagine my luck in finding such a prize, I mean, just how did he end up here?

"Well, Ciel, let's say we get you out of here?" I offer as I step closer to the cage.

"Are you a police officer?"

"No."

"Then what are you? Are you one of them?" He asks as his whole voice shudders.

"No, I am an assassin_, a hitman_ – if you will." I admit honestly, well, I've never been known to lie. He goes silent as he tries to mull over my words.

"Who hired you?"

"Well, I don't think you should concern yourself with something so trivial."

"It's not trivial to me." He pauses; I can almost hear the cogs in his brain whirling. "Can anyone hire you?"

"If the cause is right and the price matches, then yes." I kneel down in front of him, even though it's dark, I cast my eyes over him, finally seeing what he looks like.

The first thing I notice, is that he is a small child, short and wispy, completely caked in filth, his clothing is in tatters and his hair is quite matted. However, despite his appearance, he manages to wear a look of haughty pride on his face, a willful determination that is almost admirable. His large, soppy doe eyes glare at me through the bars, although I can see that his right eye seems to be discolored and cloudy as his left is a stark cobalt blue. Underneath his right eye is flaking dry blood; something has definitely happened to it – that much I can see in the dark. I want to reach out and touch it, run my fingers over his cheek just to see how long the blood has been there but of course, I think better of it.

"Well then demon, I want to hire you." He demands, unflinchingly. I fight back my urge to bust out in to laughter. He scowls at me, as he can see that I'm trying not to laugh at his request. "What's so funny? I can pay you, I have more than enough."

It seems the boy is serious.

"And what do you want?"

"Revenge." He states coldly. "I want to find out who killed my parents and who did this to me."

"It wasn't Nogoyev?"

"No – he only bought me." His face falls as he thinks; "I don't remember what happened to me after the fire." He confesses as he bites his lower lip. I can see that he's trying to stay composed – _simply admirable_.

"Your cause is indeed worthy but what would you have me do?"

"I want you to find those who did this to me." He growls as he tightens his grip on the bars, his knuckles go white as the thin skin stretches across them. This boy intrigues me, he has such hatred and determination but does he understand what he's asking?

"And when I do, what then?"

"You're a hitman, _you tell me_." His voice is sarcastic as he arches a brow to match his tone. I smile as I nod, it seems he does understand.

"So, you know what I can do but I need you to say it. It has to be an order as I work only on command."

"I want whoever did this to pay for what they have done to my parents and what they did to me."

"Do you fully understand what you ask of me?" I have to double check. Although the boy is willful, he still is a child and being responsible for taking a life is something that can weigh on a person, no matter how wronged.

"Don't mock me demon. I am no longer an innocent child _– they saw to that._ I am a man now and the head of the Phantomhive family. I demand that you take me seriously."

"You demand?" Well, it was still hard to take him seriously after that foolhardy speech; but this boy has something that I wish to possess. A straightforward determination and his need for justice is something that fascinates me deeply, especially as it's my modus operandi. I smile, and I hold out my hand to him, to which he stares at curiously, "Fine, then shall we make a contract? If we shake on it, then I become your solider and I will fight for no one but you until we achieve your revenge. Deal?"

Without hesitating, Ciel grabs my hand and squeezes it firmly with both of his hands.

Our deal is struck.


	2. Drive

For the poorly Flying Purple Kites… feel better lovely!

* * *

_'… I'm a lucky charm, pushing me along – with every breath… I'm a lucky child…'_

...

"Can you walk?" I ask him as I work to free him from the cage that holds him. He looks at me blankly as I inspect him fully. His legs look battered and like he actually hasn't gone far beyond being cooped up in this cage. He feebly shakes his head no at my question and I sigh heavily as I kneel down in front of him.

"What are you doing?" He asks me incredulously in a very clipped tone. His accent is refined, the very best received pronunciation – what did I expect from someone of such a well to do family?

I glance over my shoulder to see him fold his arms across his small chest. He is filthy, nothing but skin and bones but he still manages to pull off a haughty demeanor, worthy of a noble.

"Well, come on then." I motion him with a quick nod to come over.

"You must be joking?" He snorts. It seems that the little noble has a bad attitude.

"I'm not joking." I am firm but as soft as I can be, I can appreciate that he may be a little hesitant of me, especially given that he watched as I killed his captor and some of the spectators in this room. Although the allotted time I had planed for my escape is quickly running out, I still stay crouched down, as he doesn't move an inch. "You want to go don't you? And you can't walk far so it's this or nothing. Now just climb onto my back so I can carry you." He still hesitates. "Look, sooner rather than later – we're running out of time before the Old Bill comes."

"_Old what_?" He snips. Of course he wouldn't have heard of that type of a colloquialism, what was I thinking?

"The cops, the cops, now just get on!" I demand. I am keeping it together as much as I can but my temper is definitely starting to fray.

Tentatively, he comes towards me and then climbs onto my back. Placing my hands under his thighs, I hoist him up slightly; I can feel his whole body flinch and constrict, which is understandable, given the circumstances. I wait for a moment, allowing him to settle in and feel comfortable with me. Shortly after, I can feel his small body start to relax into my back. His boney rib cage nestles into my shoulder blades as he drapes his arms over my shoulders, clasping his hands together securely. He is as light as a feather, obviously malnourished, skeletal and pasty. I really want to know what they've done to him for however long he's been captured, really out of morbid curiosity, but I decide now is not the time to ask. He already has the bite of a snake when riled over the smallest request so maybe I'll wait until he becomes more comfortable with me. The one thing I do conclude is that it must have been horrible.

I grab my bag of gear, and we swiftly make our way out of the building and on to the main street. I march along to the corner and turn down an empty side street. This move is not a part of my original plan but I know this child will draw far too much attention and I really don't need that right now, especially as I haven't factored him into my exit strategy.

Getting halfway down the street I stop for a moment, realizing – I don't know where we're going.

"So, where to?" I ask. He's quiet for a moment.

"I – I don't know where we are." He replies meekly.

"We are somewhere in Stepney Green."

"Where is that? Is it still in London?"

You have got to be kidding me.

"Do you at least know where you live? We can go there first if you like?" I ask as I start to walk further down the side street, he's suspiciously silent. _Just what have I gotten myself into?_

"I didn't go out much." He finally replies.

"Why? Home schooled?"

"Not really, I was just always sick. My mother was always worried about me so she kept me indoors." His voice is seemingly empty of any emotion.

So, here we are, walking down a dark side street, a sickly, sullen child with a bad attitude on my back and absolutely no clue on where to go. Oh well, at least the pay is good – _wait…_

"Exactly how much will I be getting paid for this job? You are asking an awful lot of me."

Silence. There seems to be a theme here.

I guess he hasn't thought it through completely either.

"Once we get back, I will have an official contract of employment drawn up. In it, we can confirm your fee." He states calmly, perhaps he has given it some thought after all.

"Well, that all sounds very official." I smirk. He makes a slightly exasperated sound, almost as though he knows I'm mocking him. We continue down towards the High Street in absolute quiet.

"My aunt." He breaks our silence.

"Your aunt?" I repeat.

"She works in a hospital, we can go there." He suggests.

"You will have to narrow it down, there are a lot of hospitals in London."

"I know that!" He snaps. "Guy's Hospital, I think it's near London Bridge."

"Okay, we can go there." I agree, _finally, _we're getting somewhere.

I pick up the pace as I head towards the corner but just as I am about to turn, he clears his throat to halt me.

"Um." He pauses for a moment, "You never told me your name."

"I don't give out my name to clients." I reply. It's not for anonymity purposes it's just that it isn't really necessary for them to know. A name makes it personal and I prefer not to have anything on a personal level.

"Then what do I call you?"

"You can call me whatever you wish." I recommend.

"Okay." He thinks for a moment, "I think I'll call you Sebastian."

"Sebastian, that's an interesting name. Is it a relative?"

"No, it was the name of my dog." He responds curtly.

The name of his dog? _Fantastic. What a cantankerous little brat._

…

I manage to flag down a black cab – which is hard to come by in these parts and it swiftly takes us to Guy's Hospital at London Bridge.

The journey is unsurprisingly silent, which seems to be something I will have to get used to as the child doesn't seem to speak a lot – not to mention when ever he does open his mouth, such an awful attitude spews from his lips that maybe it would be best to savor the silence while I can.

Although currently, I could take him or leave him and I think about leaving him more often than not. However, he still manages to intrigue me.

I observe him as he stares vacantly out of the window, watching the city flash by. It's strange, as I watch him; I notice that despite what he has been through, he manages to be so cool and composed. It's quite admirable how he still maintains some sort of dignity. I still want to ask what happened to him but consideration seems to be getting the better of me again.

After half an hour, we pull up to the A&E entrance at the hospital.

I hop out first and go to the other side of the cab to pay the driver as Ciel opens the door. He feebly gets out but as soon as his feet touch the ground, he collapses, dropping to his knees and then falling over completely.

"Is he all right?" The cabbie calls out to me as I quickly rush over to him. I hold out my hand to halt him from getting out of the cab.

"Yeah mate, he'll be fine – I've got him." I try to reassure him as I scoop the frail child into my arms, cradling him close against my chest as his head rocks towards me.

"Sorry." He manages weakly. I smile at him sympathetically, as I carry him into through the double doors.

"It's all right, you've been through a lot." I attempt to comfort him. This is all so foreign to me as I'm not that well versed in the world of comforting but I attempt to sound warm as possible.

As we walk through the doors, he shivers slightly as the brisk blast of hot air lands on our skin as the automatic doors part. I carry him up to the reception desk but I notice everyone in the waiting room staring at me. We must look a sight, me all dressed in black, complete with my long double breasted trench coat and Ciel looking like, well, looking like he's just been freed from some hellish prison.

"Sebastian?"

"_Hm_?"

"Can you put me down?" He requests sheepishly as I'm sure he can feel the weight of everyone's stares on us as we stand there. I crouch down a bit and drop him down; he staggers over to the front desk and leans against it.

"_Oh my God_." Gasps the woman behind the counter when her blue eyes look up from her computer screen and land on the disheveled child. "I'll get a chair for you straight away." She motions to an orderly to come quickly.

"No madam, I'm not a patient." He says in his most adult voice, "I'm looking for my Aunt Ang- uh, Dr. Durless."

"Dr. Durless in OB?" She confirms as her curious eyes look over to me. I nod a confirmation, although, this is the first I've heard her name.

The receptionist puts through a page for his Aunt and we take a seat amongst the others in the waiting area. Although the majority of the room is filled with the walking wounded, their curious and suspicious eyes are unrelenting and stay glued to us. Well, I suppose we do make an odd pair.

It was about fifteen minutes later as we wait in silence. Ciel sits next to me; his head constantly keeps hitting my arm as he keeps dozing off and then waking himself up again only to repeat the process again. Finally, his head lands again and stays. I can hear his breathing become deep as he sleeps soundly and I try to stay as still as possible so as not to wake him. He must be very tired.

"_Oh my God, Ciel? It can't be_!" Ciel jolts upright as a striking woman with bright cherry red hair descends on us.

"Aunt Anne." He breathes out in a slight yawn as she grabs him, holding his battered face in her hands.

"You, how?"

"It's a long story." He mumbles through squished cheeks, "but Sebastian saved me."

She looks at him curiously. "Sebastian?"

"Pleased to meet you Dr. Durless, I'm, _er,_ Sebastian." I introduce myself.

"Sebastian?" She repeats again as she turns to me.

"Michaelis, Sebastian Michaelis." Ciel interjects. So, I have a last name now? It's fine; I kind of like it, the name sort of suits me. Dr. Durless lets go of his face and he rubs his cheeks.

"Who are you?" She seems suspicious. Of course she would be, I just appeared out of nowhere with her missing nephew.

I stand to my feet; plaster the brightest smile on my face as I face her. I'm a fast thinker, quick on my toes but I have no idea how I'm going to explain my presence to her. As my mouth drops open in the hopes that something of value will come out in the next few seconds, Ciel interjects, "Sebastian has agreed to be my bodyguard and personal butler."

_Wait, I'm sorry what? A butler?_

Her eyes dart from me to him.

"Your bodyguard and butler?" She parrots as she tries to process this information.

"Yes because whoever did this will probably try again, so as Sebastian will need to be close to me, I thought that it would be best if he could do that as my butler, you know, _to not raise suspicions_ and in doing so he will also serve me as my bodyguard." He finishes; he's quite formidable, obviously quicker at thinking on his feet than I am.

Her eyes keep moving between Ciel and my self as I try to hide my absolute confusion over the whole situation. So, I am to be his bodyguard and butler? Well, that's fine, I can be whom ever he pays me to be but I just wish he didn't spring it on me in this way.

"You know what, at this moment I don't care. You're here and you're safe – that's all that matters to me." She cries as she grabs him and holds him tightly.

…

Since we are at the hospital, his Aunt insists that a doctor sees and examines him, despite his constant childish protests. Finally, after a while, Ciel gives up and agrees to an examination and I wait outside. Leaning up against the wall of the examination room, I think about how exactly I got into this ridiculous situation. I've never been a personal bodyguard before, let alone someone's butler – I wouldn't even know where to begin; does this mean I have to live with him now? He didn't even ask me. As impressed as I am with the way he deftly answers all of her questions, I can't help but be thoroughly annoyed – the little brat must have known that's what he was going to say; he'd planned it all out but stayed quiet. _Did he trick me?_ He must have known that if that was on offer, I might have rejected the job. How clever.

My annoyance passes quickly as I become amused over the fact that in my whole career, a child bested me. I may have fun with this job after all – even if I am to be a butler. I mean, a job is a job and I am true to my contracts, I will be whatever he needs me to be. I take my job very seriously, even if he is a mere child, I will carry out his instructions to the letter, although we will have to iron out the details at a more appropriate time – no more tricks. Right now we just need to make sure he's fine.

After a while, Dr. Durless comes out of the examination room and stands beside me. She doesn't look at me; she just faces forward, staring blankly at the wall as she crosses her arms over her chest. I espy her out of the corner of my eye; she looks solemn and saddened, I take it the examination isn't going that well.

"He's lost function of his right eye." She sighs, visibility fighting the urge to break down and cry in front of me.

"Is that the worse of it?" I inquire. She bows her head, pinches the bridge of her nose and shakes her head no. "I see."

Tears start to roll down her cheeks, creating a trail in her make-up. I suppose this is what sadness actually looks like – it's interesting. In a way, I wish I knew what to do to comfort her, especially in a situation like this. I just stand close to her and offer her no solace, just company as she breaks, finally letting the tears she's tried to store fall freely. A moment passes, it isn't quick and it isn't slow – it just takes as much time as she needs to fully feel the breadth of emotions that is over taking her. Finally, she starts to compose herself, using her fingers to wipe under her eyes, smearing her mascara in the process.

Still keeping her eyes down, she clears her throat.

"Sebastian?" She addresses me by my new name.

"Yes?"

"I don't know who you are or how you found him but I own you a debt of gratitude for saving my nephew."

"I only wish I could have gotten there sooner." I didn't know what else to say.

"I wish you had too." She agrees. "It doesn't matter anyway. Throughout his examination, Ciel kept trying to convince me that you're someone who can be trusted."

"I can be."

"He's the only family I have left. I need to know, can you be trusted? Will he be safe with you?" She finally turns to me, I twist my head around to meet her gaze, her eyes are puffy and bloodshot.

"I assure you, I'm as safe as houses." I smile, "And I promise, I will do whatever it takes to protect him."

She nods and hums in acknowledgement to my declaration as she slips her hand into her lab coat pocket. Pulling out a set of keys she passes them to me. As I accept them, she wraps both of her hands around mine.

"The old Phantomhive estate is currently being rebuilt, _just in case_ – well, anyway, it's not ready yet so you both will be staying with me."

"That seems fine." I agree. She stares at me hard as she squeezes my hand tighter.

"_Sebastian_, just who are you?" She asks as the door to the examination room opens. _Thank you doc._

The examining doctor pops his head out into the hallway and motions for Dr. Durless to come back into the room. She straightens herself up and adjusts her clothing in an effort to compose herself before walking in, obviously not wanted to cause Ciel any further distress. As she passes the doctor, he still stands in the doorway, staring straight at me.

"He wants you here too." He motions for me to follow and come into the room.

As I go in, I see Ciel; he's sat on the bed looking right at me. He's draped in a hospital gown two sizes too big for his tiny frame and now has a white gauze patch covering his right eye. He looks just as I left him, sullen and annoyed as his Aunt stands right beside him, placing both of her hands on his shoulders. I take my place on the other side of him, just behind as we await the results of his exam.

"Right, well, as you know he has lost functionality of his right eye and the discoloration is due to the orbital blow out." He begins, "The STI panel came back negative, however, we will need him back in six months for retesting – just to be sure. I mean, considering what he has been through, he's quite lucky."

"_Yes,_ _lucky_." Ciel snorts sarcastically under his breath.

STI panel? It's with that; I am starting to piece together just what happened to him in that hellhole, maybe I really don't want to know after all.

The three of us listen in silence as the doctor finishes telling us the results, taking it all in. Even though he was fine, there were concerns about the fact that he was severely dehydrated and malnourished. There were bruises found on his ribcage and wounds on his back that will need constant attention – I suppose that will be my job now.

Once he finishes, the doctor leaves the room as Dr. Durless begins to help Ciel dress. She frowns as the clothing he came in is in tatters and very filthy but there was nothing else to put him in. As I watch her struggle to keep it together again, I unbutton my coat and shrug it off. Turning towards Ciel, I carefully put it over his shoulders, covering him. My coat dwarfs him, shrinking him even further. He doesn't seem to mind as he grasps the sides and pulls it tight around his body as his cheeks start to redden. Feeling embarrassed, he looks away.

"Thank you." He mumbles.

"Not a problem young master." I smile; his eye darts over to me as he instantly furrows his brow, sensing that I might have been mocking him.

We have a long road ahead of us.

* * *

_Chapter tile track: Warpaint – Drive _


	3. Darkangel

_'Give me time, I will be clear. Given time you'll understand what possesses me to right what you have suffered…'_

…

It is past nightfall; the street is pitch black as it is so late at night that even the streetlamps are switched off as the cab pulls up and drops us off at the townhouse of Dr. Durless. The outside is beautiful, each bush and shrub is well manicured and the stonework leading up to the red lacquered door was pristine, not one crack in any slab.

We meander up the large stone steps and the red painted door starts to open and an elderly gentleman appears. His wrinkled eyes widen as they fall on Ciel, who is still draped in my coat. In an instant; his arms fly open and surround Ciel, holding him tightly.

"Young master, thank God you're all right." He breathes out. Ciels' tiny arms reach out and embrace him back. I wonder what kind of child he was before all of this occurred – granted it's been less than twelve hours since we met but he's never let his sullen façade crack, not once, but here, here he is smiling and tears start to fall freely from his left eye.

After the moment, the old man finally lets him go and he turns to me, dropping his arms to his side.

"You must be Mr. Michaelis. I am the house steward for the Phantomhive family, Tanaka. Thank you for returning the young master Ciel back to us." He says just as he bows deeply. I am taken aback by the way he shows his gratitude, it is different from what I normally receive, which is an uncomfortable out pouring of emotions as they hug me but I welcome this, favoring it.

"It was nothing." That's all I can think of as a reply, as he straightens himself upright again.

He outstretches his arm and ushers us into the townhouse.

Stepping through and taking it all in, I see that it's rather elegant on the inside, tastefully done – although, I'm not sure what I was expecting. The walls are painted a pale cream color to match the slate grey or cream furniture and fixings. At first glance, it seems that the décor is quite bland but there are vibrant, bold red accents throughout and they stand boldly against the subdued walls.

Red must be a color Dr. Durless finds an affinity with as the theme is carried throughout the house.

"You must be tired." Tanaka says as he bends down towards Ciel who nods. He must be exhausted; it has truly been a long night's journey into the morning as we were at the hospital for a lot longer than anticipated.

"Actually, I'm famished – is there anything to eat?" He struggles to stifle a yawn.

"What would the young master like?"

Ciel thinks for a moment and then a devious smile creeps onto his lips.

"Cake?" His eye is large and bright as he looks up at the old man. It's strange; around Tanaka, his whole demeanor has become all round childlike as he voices his request.

"Of course, I've already prepared your favorite chocolate cake for your arrival." Ciels' face brightens at the comment. "Why don't you have a bath and I'll bring a piece to your room?" He offers. Nodding, Ciel starts to hobble off through the hall.

Dr. Durless has already prepared everything for our stay whilst we were in the hospital so Ciel already knows where to go. I start to follow him but a hand stops me, looking over my shoulder, Tanaka motions for me to follow him. My mouth drops open to say something but he shakes his head and hushes my action.

I trail behind him as he leads me into the kitchen.

He walks over to the island in the middle of the room, moving to the other side. Bending over slightly, he opens a drawer, pulling out a book and sliding it over the countertop towards me.

"He is going to need you more than you know." He states calmly.

"I don't understand."

He hums softly to himself.

"As you are now going to serve the young master, I think it's best if you understand something about the Phantomhive family."

"Okay?"

"It's all contained in this journal." He pauses for a moment as he reflects over something, "I have survived two generations of Phantomhives and almost a third – my time here is done. It's your turn now." With that, he turns and goes to the cabinet, opening it, he pulls out a small plate and sits it on the counter. "You should attend to the young master and get him ready for his bath." He advises with his back still to me.

"Yes, right, and where is that, exactly?"

"Straight down the hall and to your left."

Taking the book, I make my way down the hall and to the left as instructed.

Popping my head through the door, I spy Ciel, sat on top of the bed – waiting.

"Sebastian?" He seems surprised by my appearance.

"Yes?"

"Where's Tanaka?"

"He sent me in here to get you ready for your bath."

He shrugs, "I guess that's fine, you'll have to learn how to do this now anyway."

"About that, why didn't you tell me about your plan to have me be your butler?"

"You wouldn't have gone through with it."

I sit the journal down on the desk by the window and move to stand in front of him.

"You don't know that. I have been known to take on whatever task my contractor asks of me. It is a part of my job."

"I'm sorry for second guessing you." He apologizes as he looks away.

"Apology accepted. Now, what do I do?"

His eye darts back over to me.

"You have drawn a bath before, haven't you?" His tone is incredulous as he arches his brow at me.

"Actually, I'm a shower kinda guy." I retort playfully, he frowns, I suppose he's not in the mood.

"It's simple." He starts, "First you take the rubber stopper and you put it in the plug hole at the bottom to stop the water from draining. Then you turn on the faucets to fill said bath tub with water and-"

"You can stop at any time." I groan, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

"Well, you seemed lost on the concept." He scoffs as he leans back onto his elbows.

Jesus, I wonder who is trying to kill this kid? They're going to be seriously disappointed about wasting their time because I may just beat them to it.

He stares at me curiously.

"What now?"

"Part of getting me ready is undressing me."

"What?" I choke on my own saliva, "You're fucking with me, right?"

"Watch your language and no I'm not." He states seriously. "Go draw the bath and I will wait here." He demands.

I start to head towards the en suite bathroom. _Yeah, I'll draw the bath, and then I'll hold your head down in it until the last oxygen bubble reaches the surface – problem solved._ I grumble silently to myself.

The en suite is huge, and bigger than my bedroom in my flat. Against the far right wall, there is a free standing bathtub with beautiful porcelain faucets that point into it. Rolling up my selves, I put the plug in the hole and turn on the tap, letting the water pour in. Looking around, I find a bottle of bubble bath solution; maybe the little lord would enjoy a bubble bath? I think to myself as I unscrew the lid and pour in the solution. I watch as it starts to froth up and as soon as it hits an appropriate level, I turn off the tap, grab a large looking towel from the shelf nearby and head back into the room.

Tanaka is there, just clearing away the plate of what I assume to be the requested piece of cake. The pair seemed to be discussing something as they talk in hushed tones and, as I come into view, they stop quickly.

"Your bath is ready." I announce.

"Thank you Sebastian." He glances over to Tanaka who just grins broadly. "Tanaka has already arranged a new uniform for you, which you will wear starting tomorrow, as well as your contract of employment."

"Thank you." I nod, that was fast. Tanaka leaves the room as I hold out the towel in front of Ciel, turning my head away.

"What are you doing?"

"I am not undressing you." I state firmly.

"Fine. I appreciate that this is new to you so I'll give you a pass tonight but only for tonight." He sighs as he starts to undress. Once finished, he takes the towel and wraps it around himself. I escort him into the bathroom, turning my head again as he goes into the tub.

"It feels hot."

I turn to him and see him still standing in the middle of the tub.

"I'm sure it's fine." I try to assure him.

He hesitates for a moment then tentatively sits down.

"AHHH!" He screeches, "It's boiling!"

I quickly turn on the cold water tap.

"I am so sorry!" I apologize as I try to splash the cold water in his direction.

"Didn't you test the temperature?"

"Truthfully no." I admit as I dip my hand beneath the surface of bubbles and into the water. He reaches over and pulls my head towards him, dunking me in the scolding hot, soapy water.

Losing my footing, I slip further into the tub and then fall backwards. "You little bastard!" I shout as splutter water all over the place.

A wry smile finds its way onto his lips.

"I told you it was hot." He smirks as he folds his arms across his chest.

Keep calm, I can do this – _I will not kill this boy_. I do like a challenge and Ciel certainly is one.

Clearing my throat and running my hands through my wet hair, I start to stand back up again, rolling my shoulders in the process. Ciel looks scared as he watches me come towards him. _Scared?_ He fucking should be.

"You would be very wise _not_ to try that again." I warn as I turn off the cold water tap. He sits motionless, seemingly afraid to breathe.

Walking behind him, I crouch down and place my hand on his shoulder and he flinches.

"What are you doing?" He asks me dubiously.

"I'm checking your back."

"Why?"

"The doctor warned that if it's not checked it'll get infected." I gently touch his back and he jolts sharply.

"Don't touch me!" He hisses.

"I have to check your back." I insist as I lean forward to try again. Ciel slams himself against the edge of the tub and showers me with water. The bubble solution starts to irritate and burn my eyes.

"I said, do not touch me." He growls.

"Fine!" I throw my hands up and I start to stand to my feet. "At least let me help you out."

"No, I can do it. Just leave me a moment." He barks.

Fine by me.

Grabbing another towel, I leave the bathroom and march back into the bedroom. I am dripping wet with water, after being dunked and subsequently splashed, and I shake myself off to stop my clothing from sticking to me. What a nightmare.

As I enter the bedroom, I see Tanaka was back, laying some clothing down on the bed.

"I heard the commotion so I took the liberty of finding something for you to change into. It may be a bit small but hopefully, it fits." He must have heard us.

"Thanks." I say as he bows slightly and starts to leave the room. "Is he always like this?"

He stops at the doorway and shakes his head sadly.

"No. I wish you could have met the young master before..." He trails off for a moment, "he was such a happy child." He concludes before he leaves the room.

A happy child? Well, that's a stark difference to what I see now. Has he really changed that much?

Neither wasting any time nor wanting to stay in these wet clothes any further, I change into my new set quickly. Simple black slacks, crisp white shirt, black fitted silk waistcoat and matching tie. There is a suit jacket but considering it's one in the morning, I suspect I won't need it just yet.

Sitting down on the bed, to finish retying my shoelaces, I hear a loud crash from the bathroom. Leaping to my feet and racing inside, my eyes land on a naked Ciel, huddled in a pile on the wet floor. Grabbing another towel, I rush over to him and surround him. I notice the wounds on his back start to open and weep slightly; they really need to be tended to. Squatting down behind him, I wrap the towel around him delicately and lift him up in a half embrace as he leans back into me.

"What happened?" I keep my voice as soft as possible as I gently dab him with the towel around his shoulders and neck, taking great care to not touch his wounds.

"I slipped. My legs just gave way." He sighs heavily, wincing occasionally as the fibers of the towel grazed past a wound or bruise.

"I know you don't want me to psychically touch you but I really need to dress these." My voice is as sweet and as honeyed as I can make it. I lean back and try to stand up again, holding my hand out to help him up as well but he refused.

"I can stand on my own." He tries to move away from me again but collapses.

This time, I'm mad.

Grabbing him and tightly squeezing around his upper arms, I lift him to his feet.

"You hired me to protect you and that's all that I'm trying to do. Do not waste my time here because I can assure you, looking after a spoiled little brat is _not_ my idea of fun."

He looks at me blankly as I ease my grip on him, "Now, will you let me help you or not?" He nods solemnly and I exhale loudly, completely exasperated by the whole thing. "Okay then."

I kneel down in front of him and finish carefully patting him dry as he stands there silently with a sheepish look on his face. As I finish, the strangest gurgling noise emits from his stomach and I look up at him curiously.

"Are you hungry?" I ask. He nods in reply. "Okay, well I can try to make you something?"

"Try?"

"I don't really know how to cook."

"How do you eat?"

"I don't on the whole but when I do, it's a take away."

"What can you make?"

I think for a moment.

"Well, I can try to make scrambled eggs, if you like?"

"Fine." He resigns. I smile politely as I wrap the towel around his waist, taking care to not touch him with my hands as I tuck the ends in together, neatly.

"Can you walk?" I inquire.

"I'm not getting on your back again." He snorts.

"No, this time, I was going to give you my arm." I hold out my arm and he balances himself against me as I guide him back into the bedroom. He plops himself down on the bed as I notice that Tanaka has already left out a nightshirt. _Thank you Tanaka_.

Draping the shirt over his shoulders, he slides his arms through the sleeves and I start to work my way through the buttons, starting from the top down. When I finish, I reach underneath his shirt and start to tug at the towel. Ciels' whole body flinches and he grips the duvet tightly. I sigh as I remove the towel from his waist, sliding it down and off completely. As I fold it, I see that he's looking away, biting his lower lip and still completely tensed up.

I don't know what I can do to set his mind at ease. We're going to be working closely together for the foreseeable future and I really need him to start to trust me or this will never work. I place the towel over the back of the chair next to his desk and I stand in front of him, waiting for him to look at me. It takes a while but finally he turns to me and I drop down on to one knee, placing my right hand over my heart as my eyes lock into his.

"I don't know what you must think of me, especially after what you saw me do yesterday but please be assured, I am not like those people and I will never harm you." I pause for a moment as I observe him, his body starts to relax and his face begins to soften. "As I said to you the moment we made this contract, I am _your_ solider and I will fight for no one but you. I will be your chess piece, your pawn – move me however you see fit. I will not do anything without your order or command. Most importantly, Ciel, you can feel safe with me, you _are _safe with me. This, I promise you."

With that, his whole body relaxes and he loses his grip on the duvet.

I do not know why, especially as he is an unmitigated nightmare, but I feel an overwhelming desire to protect him and keep him safe. I don't know what he has been through but I do know that my sense of justice compels me to help him achieve his revenge. I start to stand and bow slightly; which is something that I have observed from Tanaka.

"Now, if you'll excuse me young master, I shall go and prepare your eggs." I start to leave the room but I can feel his eye still on me, following me as I walk out of the door.

...

In the kitchen, I hunt around for anything resembling a frying pan. Everything here is copper plated and in pristine condition. Either Tanaka has the ability to keep things immaculate or Dr. Durless just doesn't cook – considering, by her own admission, that she's never here, I assume it's the latter rather than the former. Finally finding a cast iron skillet with a little bit of wear, I put it on the stove and turn on the heat. This shouldn't be so hard; I've seen it done several times before on cooking shows. I just add the eggs and milk – simple.

Assembling the ingredients and adding some touches à la the Food Network UK, I have the eggs in the pan cooking away. As I stir them, it dawns on me; perhaps he would enjoy a cup of tea? Tea, the great comforter, the hug in a mug as the adverts would have us believe. I never really cared for the stuff myself but, like the eggs, it can't be too hard to put together, I just add the teabag to some hot water – even simpler.

I fill a nearby kettle with water and click it on. A strong pungent smell hits my nose and I look around for what it could be… _the eggs!_ I head back to the stove and switch it off. Picking up the pan, I immediately drop it as I burn my hand on the hot iron handle, it lands on the stove with a clang and the kettle starts to boil over – I must have filled it with too much water as there is a pool of hot water underneath it and running down the countertop, dripping down the sides. I look around for a dishcloth and see one neatly folded over the handle of the oven. Grabbing it, I move to clean up the liquid and in my haste; I knock over several glass bottles of olive oil, sending some of them to the ground, shattering oil all over the place.

"What on Earth is going on in here?" I look over towards the door and see Ciel as he comes into the kitchen. He walks over to the counter, pulling out a nearby stool and climbing on top of it, watching me as I basically destroy his Aunts' kitchen.

"Young master, what uh, what are you doing here?" I blow the stray strands of hair from out of my face as I try to compose myself, slipping slightly from the oil on the ground – this is not my finest moment.

"You were making such a racket." He huffs as he rests his elbows on the marble top and puts his chin in the palms of his hands as he observes me.

I grab the plate I took out earlier and dish out the eggs. Putting a tea bag into a mug and pouring in whatever was left of the hot water, I let it steep for a moment and I dig through the drawers for a fork and a teaspoon. Ciel watches me with interest as I continue to flail about the kitchen.

Finally, I present him with the plate of somewhat burnt eggs and the mug of tea, with the bag still in it.

Looking at it nervously, he picks up the fork and spears some of the tufts of egg with the tines. He slowly brings it to his mouth and wraps his lips around it – chewing on it for a moment before he spits it out.

"That's disgusting!" He chokes as he reaches for the tea, "Why does it taste like vinegar?"

"Isn't that what you put in eggs to stiffen up the whites?" Well, that is what I remember from the cooking shows.

"That's for meringues!" He shouts as he glugs down the tea to wash his mouth out. His whole face puckers just before he spews tea all over the counter. "This is horrible!"

"Oh, well I must admit, I've never actually made tea before either."

"Well that's obvious." He snorts as he wipes his mouth on his sleeve.

"I can try to make you something else?" I offer.

"No!" He declares as he slides off the stool, adjusting his nightshirt. "I'm going to bed, clean up this mess and try not to burn the house down." He grumbles as he makes his way out of the kitchen, stopping just at the doorway, bracing himself against it. "You can't cook, you can't make a cup of tea – what can you do?" He sighs exasperatedly.

"I can kill." I state firmly. He glances over his shoulder towards me, "and that's what you hired me for is it not?" A slight smile creeps onto his lips as he turns back to hide it from me. "I can assure you, in that respect, I'm the best." I conclude.

He nods and leaves the kitchen. I lean over the counter and hold my head in my hands. To make this work, I'm going to have to learn how to be a butler, it seems that some research is needed.

…

After cleaning the kitchen and finding a tray, I put a mug of warmed milk on it with various things to sweeten it with. I make my way back to Ciels' room and open the door, seeing him lying on his stomach, sprawled out on the top. I set the tray down on the bedside table and his head rolls over to look at me.

"I brought you some warm milk."

"Is there vinegar in it?" He asks sarcastically.

"No. I added nothing to it, just popped it in the microwave and I even tested the temperature." I smile. He hums in acknowledgement and starts to sit up.

"Is there any honey?"

"I brought some, would you like it?" I hand him the mug as he nods.

"Tanaka normally wouldn't let me have it."

"Then starting tomorrow, I'll do the same." I hand him jar of honey and a spoon and watch as he ladles three spoonfuls into it. It seems his sweet tooth goes beyond cakes as he stirs in his satisfied amount of honey into his milk. A smile appears on his lips as he sips it.

"This is good."

Ah, finally, something he can enjoy.

I will admit, when he's like this, he looks almost fragile. Everything about him is doll like – from his soft porcelain skin, long, lush eyelashes that surround his big blue eye, to his silky slate colored hair that sweeps just over his forehead delicately. Even dressed in this simple nightshirt, he looks sweet, almost innocent.

It's strange, I couldn't put it into actual words if I tried but something makes me want to help him. Not just out of obligation of our contract – I want to protect him. Especially as I reflect on what Tanaka mentioned earlier, he used to be such a happy child. Who ever did this took that from him. They took his parents and stole his childhood and his innocence – soiling him and sullying his family name. How dare they? And for what reason? Truthfully, I can't wait to find out.

I will enjoy finding them, hunting them down and I will get such pleasure in killing them – I will right this wrong.

Ciel hands back the empty mug and I sit it down on the tray. He scoots himself back and I pull the duvet and blankets out from underneath him, allowing him to slip in underneath.

"You are going to have to learn how to cook."

"I know."

"I can't go on living off of milk like a puppy." He snaps. I want to respond in an equally brusque way but I think better of it – I realize that he may be acting like this to see what type of reaction he'll get from me. This time, I'm not going to bite.

"Of course young master." I smile, which seems to annoy him.

I switch on the bedside lamp and walk over to the main light switches on the wall, turning them off.

"Sebastian?" Ciel calls over to me, his voice is low and soft.

"Yes?"

"Do you have any family?"

"No."

"Not a mother or a father?"

"No." I reply as I go back over to him, I start to fluff the pillow from behind his back.

"Hm, well as least we have that in common."

"Is it important to you that we have something in common?"

"No but, um, doesn't it bother you?"

"I don't remember them so I can't say that it does."

"Oh." I watch his face fall as he averts his eyes. I slide the blankets over his lap and he wiggles into the bed to try and make himself comfortable. I can see that he wants to ask me something further but that he keeps desperately fighting the urge. It must weigh on his mind, the death of his parents – he must really miss them.

Standing upright, I smooth down my waistcoat. I'm sure I'll get used to it over time but currently it's cumbersome and feels constrictive.

"Right then young master, good night." I smile as I collect the tray and start to head towards the door.

"Sebastian?" He almost whispers as he stops me.

"Yes?"

"_Um_… do you think you could stay with me? At least until I fall asleep?" He asks shyly. I turn back to him with a slight grin.

"Of course." Walking back, I go over to the desk and sit the tray down on top of it. I take the nearby chair and move it right by the bed. I feel his eyes follow each movement with interest as I sit down beside him. "I will sit right here until you fall asleep." I confirm. His face starts to relax as he slides himself under the blankets. As soon as his head hits the pillow, I reach over and switch off the bedside lamp, covering the room in darkness.

As I sit here, I start to wonder about what Ciel has been through, I am still curious and I really want to inquire about what happened but I keeping weighing it out in my mind, after the hospital visit – I'm not so sure I really do want to know anymore. What I do know is that as I sit here, I feel like I understand him a bit better, _hell,_ I might even like the kid. That thought alone makes me chuckle slightly.

"Sebastian, could you keep it down? I'm trying to sleep here." He barks.

I take that back.

* * *

**Chapter title track:** VNV Nation – Darkangel

**Authors' Note:** To Guest: Yes – there will be Sebastian x Ciel stuff.


	4. Like Bullets

_'We can walk like bullets and talk like bullets, in and out your face but you'll never notice…'_

…

As soon as I feel he is sound asleep, I finally leave Ciels' room. Closing the door behind me softly, I make my way down the hall but as soon as I turn the corner, I see Tanaka as he passes me in the hall.

"Good morning Sebastian." He greets me. _Morning?_ I guess I was in there longer than I thought. Ciel tossed and turned so much that I was sure he'd eventually wake himself, so I stayed and watched over him as promised.

"What time is it?" I wonder aloud. Tanaka smiles and reaches into his pocket, pulling out a large, round antique silver pocket watch. He hands it to me and I accept it, running my thumb over the intricately engraved surface.

"You can keep it." He offers and I nod as I politely accept it, slipping it into my own pocket as he starts to leave.

"Wait, the other day, you said that Ciel was going to need me more than I know – what did you mean by that?"

"Read the journal Sebastian, it's all in there. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have breakfast preparations to attend to." He pauses for a moment, "The floor is slick with oil, you wouldn't know anything about that would you?"

"It was a cooking experiment gone horribly wrong." I admit. I can see him struggle to stop himself from bursting out into laughter – instead, all I get is a _'ho ho ho'_ as he takes his leave towards the kitchen.

I wander towards the room that is meant for me. I haven't had the chance to see it yet, as I have been doing nothing but attending to Ciel. It's not as though I have much anyway, the only thing I have is my gear bag with the cloak and mask that I must remember to dispose of, especially as they are the only things linking me to the event. Not that it's going to be fully investigated. In my experience with these things, the police will do whatever it takes to sweep it all under the proverbial rug especially as there must have been members in the high echelons of society as attendees or else, why the need for cloaks and masks? That reminds me, how did Ciel end up there?

I sit down on the bed and leaf through Tanakas' journal and I realize, I need to start from the beginning. Going right back to the start, I focus and read – studying each page, absorbing each sentence as I would with any other piece of research. I will admit, I find what I'm reading horrifies me slightly. It's almost as though Ciels' parents were doomed to the fate that befell them from the start.

It starts innocently enough, the family own a toy manufacturing company called Funtom, even I have heard of this company before, they've been around since 1880 – but it seems that that is just subterfuge for what they actually do. The Phantomhives are the heads of a Network – the most powerful Network in the underground; they are so powerful that they're untouchables. Their power comes from the fact that they are given permission to rule by the government and MI5, which means they are the enforcers, _the guard dogs_ of the underground and they rule with an iron fist.

I know there are always power struggles between rival Families, but this was a hit and a professional one. I wonder, is that what happened? There must have been a hit sanctioned on the Phantomhives and the Network that did this wasn't just seeking some kind of hasty revenge against the untouchables, they were out for blood. I don't understand – if the Phantomhives were the untouchables, who would feel bold enough to carry out this hit? Also, for as good a murder this was – _even I was impressed when I read about it_ – it was sloppy, they really fucked up and made a mistake, they let the boy live. Why would they let Ciel live?

The whole journal reads like a crime drama or spy novel but one thing is clear – when Ciel told me that he is now the head of the Phantomhives, he means it, he is now head and in control of this Network - all at the age of twelve.

Closing the book, I touch it to my forehead as I think to myself. On the one hand, guarding a child of a Network is not what I had in mind. Did he even know what this all entails? Does he truly know the fate of his family? If he does, he doesn't seem phased in the slightest. Which again means that he bested me – duping me into this job as his guardian. I would be annoyed but there is the other hand, and that is the fact that this job could be interesting.

Tossing the book beside me, I lay down, covering my eyes with my right arm and I let my thoughts wander: the Phantomhive Family, the Network, who killed them? What is Ciels' fate? The Family is so powerful it could've been anyone who sanctioned this hit. As the story in the book goes, their death was destiny, just as Ciels' Grandmother before that, she was murdered at the age of thirty-six, only slightly older than her son Vincent and his wife Rachel.

_Why would they let Ciel live? _

I try to clear my mind as it races frantically – and then finally – silence. I inhale and exhale deeply as my mind drains out and allows the silence to creep in and then I start to fall asleep.

...

Sleep.

I was asleep.

It is such a rare thing for me, a luxury I only partake in every once in a while. I don't really need sleep, I can function very well without it but sometimes it's nice to have. Stretching my arms out above my head and emitting a low groan, I start to open my eyes and let them adjust to the light. I guess I must've drifted off for a few minutes.

"Have a nice nap?" I bolt up instantly and I look over to my left. Ciel is sitting at the nearby desk, his legs are crossed and he's resting his chin on the back of his knuckles casually as he watches me. He's dressed quite elegantly, long black slacks with a sharp crease down the front, a white shirt, striking navy blue tie that matches his eye perfectly and a knitted gray argyle vest. After last night, I'm sure he didn't dress himself; it must have been Tanaka, who has very good taste. The outfit ages him and makes him look as formidable as he actually is.

"How long have I been asleep - how long have you been there for?"

"Two hours."

"Two hours? You should've woken me." I yawn slightly as I rub my eyes with the base of my palms. Why is he sitting there watching me sleep? I want to ask but before I get the chance, Ciel reaches behind him and grabs a stack of papers from on top of the desk and tosses it over to me.

"What's this?"

"Your contract. I suggest you read through it very carefully." He insists.

Picking it up I do as instructed and read through it. It is a very thorough and quite detailed document. In it, he confirms my role as his butler and what I'm to do. It also goes through my role as his bodyguard, which includes the caveat of putting my own life on the line to protect his. This is something I've never considered before, even as an assassin, I know my job is dangerous but I would never lay down my life for the sake of somebody else not even for a client.

As I stare at the papers in my hand, I really have to think, is it worth it? Ciel is now the head of the Family and I've now gathered that he knows exactly what he is asking me. It's only taken me a few minutes to suss him out and I realize Ciel is more than just a clever child. Like the journal states, he was born to do this, whether his turn was going to be now or later on – he was prepped from the start. He may have been a sick child but he was being primed to take over, I mean, as I said earlier, his parents' deaths were fated – it was only a matter of time.

Turning to the last page, I see my fee. I glance over it, then my eyes dart to him and then back to the black-and-white ink on the page in utter confusion.

"I think you'll find the terms of your contract is fair and the fee to match." He states, very matter of fact as he uncrosses and crosses his legs again, nonchalantly.

"It's generous, I'll say that." I have never seen a fee with so many zeros before.

"Well it states that in the contract you will live with me from now on and that basically, your life belongs to me." He pauses as he smiles wryly over that last statement, "I think for what I'm requesting you to do, for however long it takes, this is fair - especially per year." He finishes.

My eyes widen in shock.

"This is per year?" I manage to get out.

"Come now Sebastian, how much is your life worth to you?" He asks.

That's a good point, looking at the details of his contract, he is asking me to basically die for him if push comes to shove and I will be paid handsomely for it. Fine, I can kill some time doing this – I'm pretty indifferent towards my life anyway and I'm very good at my job so I don't think I'll get us in a position where this will be challenged.

"Where do I sign?"

He tosses me a pen from the top of the desk. Catching it, I look at the bottom of the page, which is where I have to sign – it's also under my fee. As well as where I must sign, there seem to be three additional requests that I am to adhere to as it stipulates in my contract that I will not get paid unless I comply.

The first request: That I protect him and never betray him until he obtains his revenge, the second request; that I obey all of his orders unconditionally and finally, the third request; that I never lie.

I'll be honest, they all seem quite difficult to adhere to, especially when I am to play the role of a butler, a butler who will now serve the head of a Family but I shrug and agree to his terms, acknowledging it with my signature, which I sign underneath where he's written his own name, of course, in perfect calligraphy script.

I now belong to Ciel Phantomhive.

...

One month has passed and I think I'm adapting fairly well to being a butler, or rather, as well as can be expected – I am human after all. Ciel refuses to leave the townhouse, which is fine for me at the moment as it's easier to keep my eye on him.

In the last few weeks since I have met him, I have never really left Ciels' side. Whenever I do, it's to allow him to have a nap or to clean the house. I left once to go to my flat and get everything I think I'm going to need whilst I carry out my contract, especially as it seems that I am going to be here for the foreseeable future. I invited him to come along with me but he refused.

My relationship with Ciel is occasionally terse. I'm still unsure if he trusts me or even likes me for that matter but I don't really care if he likes me or not, it's trusting me that's the issue. He has to believe that I will protect him no matter what and at this moment in time, I really don't think that he does. Still, we've come to an understanding and a daily routine that seems to suit us both quite well.

Whenever I get a moment, I like to go back to my room and re-read the journal Tanaka gave me. I've highlighted a few things that stand out and I've made plenty of notes, along with news research on the family and their death. I'm not sure what I'm hoping to find but at least it's further information that can help me if needed.

"_Ahem_." I hear him clear his throat behind me. I shut the lid to my laptop and close the book as I turn to him.

"Young master." I greet him as I stand. He walks into my room and jumps on top of my bed, flopping onto his back and staring at the ceiling. "Did you need something?"

"Not really."

"Then may I ask what you're doing?" I question. I do find it strange that he's in here, especially when he never gives my room much thought before.

"What do you do in here?" He asks curiously.

"Research."

"Research?" He repeats, not looking at me once.

"You hired me to find who killed your parents, that is what I'm doing." I reply as I move in front of him, holding out my hand to pull him up.

He takes my hand and I drag him forward, causing him to sit up right.

"Have you found anything out yet?"

"No. Do you know what your family history is?"

"I have an idea." He smirks, of course he does and he now knows that I know it too.

"Doesn't that bother you?"

"Should it?" He shrugs.

"I don't understand how you can be so blasé about it all."

"It is what it is Sebastian, I can't do anything to change who I am."

"What happens when they come for you again?"

"Do you think they will?"

"I don't doubt it."

"Well, as long as I stay in this house, everyone thinks I'm dead so I'm not too worried just yet." He sighs as he hops down off of the bed and walks back towards the door. So, that's why he hasn't left the house yet, he doesn't want to be seen.

"Young master, you have to trust that I will protect you." I call out over to him. He hums in acknowledgement as he nods his head.

"You better hurry and straighten, up my aunt is coming today and she can't see you like this." He warns over his shoulder.

"Dr. Durless? I thought she wasn't coming back this week?"

"No, my other Aunt, my Aunt Francis." He says coolly with a slight shiver down his spine.

_There's two?_

…

Later that afternoon, I assist Tanaka with preparations for Ciels' Aunts' arrival. I'd really like to know who she is and what she's like, especially as, even though Tanaka and I have things under control, we brought in an additional day cleaner to help make sure that the house is immaculate order. In my cooking research, I have already learned how to prepare lavender and honey scones from scratch, which I make quickly, as well as a variety of finger sandwiches for High Tea.

I always thought High Tea was a luxury for the rich 'ladies who lunch' who have nothing better to do with their time. They would descend upon the Savoy or the Ritz and sit there at four o'clock, decked out in their ridiculous hats and fascinators nibbling and sipping away as they natter away discussing things like so-and-sos mistress and other such tedious trivia.

I must say, on the whole, humans bore me and I have absolutely no time for them. Everything is for appearances sake and none of it is worth it. Humans have done nothing but impose their own thoughts and values on others to validate themselves and prove that they are right – no matter what. This spreads across everything, religion, wars and politics – all of it. I know I call myself a monster but I always felt that the real evil here isn't me but mankind. I only eradicate the worse of the worse; I clean up the causes of the messes before they can make more.

Finally, the preparations are complete and the cleaner dismissed. Going back into my room, I change into my new uniform. It's similar to the one Tanaka first gave me but the white shirt has thin pleating in the front and the back of the waistcoat has two adjustable straps. This suit fits me better, the cut is perfect for my build, the fabric is sumptuous and even the brogues on my feet are polished to a high shine. Catching myself in the mirror, I'll admit, I cut quite a dashing figure.

Leaving my room, I walk down the hall past Ciels' room. I decide to poke my head through the door and I see him sat on the bed, he is vacantly staring towards the window as he absentmindedly twirls a large blue stone ring around his thumb, sighing heavily as it makes another rotation around.

"Are you alright young master?" I inquire as I stand in front of him but he doesn't knowledge me. "Young master?"

"Hm? Sorry." He looks up at me, his right eye is uncovered and I can see the discoloration in contrast to the blue in his left.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes Sebastian, I'm fine. I think it's just the day." His voice seems quite saddened. The day? I wonder, is it his aunt coming to visit? I can see a black silk eye patch beside him, normally he wears a medical gauze patch but Tanaka must have gotten him a new one. Leaning over I pick it up and I gently places over his right eye, holding it still, I pull the strings back and delicately tie a knot behind his head.

"Thank you." He says as he adjusts it slightly.

The doorbell rings and he inhales sharply, exhaling as he slides off the bed onto his feet, smoothing his hair back and out of his face with both hands as he walks towards the door. "Come Sebastian." He beckons me from over his shoulder.

Following slightly behind him as we walk down the hallway, we can hear a woman's voice speaking as well as Tanaka. We turn the corner and make our way towards the front door. Before Ciel can utter a single greeting, a shriek that could cut glass sounds out. The next thing I know, a blonde comes hurtling towards Ciel, her arms circle around him as she pounces, sending him staggering back, almost in to me.

As she holds him tightly, he looks thoroughly uncomfortable with this whole interaction, which amuses me greatly, and I put my hand to my lips as I stifle a laugh. That action alone causes my young master to shoot me a haughty look of disdain as he tries to peel the young girl off of him.

She is slightly taller than him; long blonde hair in two curly pigtails with a stray strand that falls over her forehead and her dress was very, for lack of a better word, cute. It was a light orange color with a yellow satin sash across the waist tied into a neat bow at the side.

"Elizabeth, you are a lady, act like one."

Suitably chastised, the girl looks sheepish and relaxes her tight hold on Ciel. My eyes move from them over to the woman standing next to Tanaka. She is a statuesque woman with her hands firmly on her hips and a scowl on her face. Scowl aside; she's really quite beautiful. Clad in a tight figure hugging dress with three quarter length sleeves, the hemline falls just below her knees outlining taught thighs. Her blonde hair is in a tight bun, but there is a stray strand that at first would seem out of place. However, I bet it was done on purpose, as nothing about this woman strikes me as casual or careless with a hint of whimsy. I suppose she has done it to match her daughter.

Elizabeth lets go of Ciel and steps back.

"Sorry mother." She apologizes as her mother approaches Ciel. She places her hands on Ciel cheeks and her stern face softens.

"Ciel, welcome back." Her pursed lips relax into a smile and she steps into him, wrapping both of her arms around him and embracing him, stroking the back of his head gently. I glance over to Elizabeth whose body visibly shakes as she tries desperately to compose herself. I can see that she wants to cry but out of fear of what her mother will say, she holds herself together tightly, maintaining her composure.

As his Aunt releases him, her attention quickly turns to me.

"And what is this?" Her tone is as sharp as a dagger as she inspects me, her eyes trailing up and down my body.

"I am Sebastian, the young master Ciels' new butler." I introduce myself.

"I know who you are and how my nephew ever let you appear like this in front of me I'll never know." She snaps. I know my face must look stunned, as I thought I looked rather sharp. "Indecent, completely indecent." She scoffs as she approaches me. I've dealt with many different types of people before and most of which have been some very tough clients but I have never been afraid before. The moment she stood in front of me, my blood went cold.

Reaching out and grabbing a fistful of my hair she holds it up.

"Your hair is scruffy butler. Look at Tanaka, not one strand out of place." She smoothes my hair behind my ears, slicking it back with both hands.

"There, you don't look half bad now." She steps back to observe her work. "Your face on the other hand. I mean, are you auditioning for Britain's Next Top Model?"

There is a slight giggle and both of our heads turn towards the girl, who looks back at us curiously as it wasn't her but instead, it was Ciel who presses the knuckle of his index finger against his lips as he chuckles to himself. His Aunts' face relaxes completely, as though melted and she lets out an airy chuckle as well.

"As indecent though you may be, you brought my nephew home and I thank you for that." She smiles at me.

"Tea is ready, if you will please progress to the sitting room?" Tanaka moves them along. Ciel and his Aunt go through first and I start to follow them but a small hand reaches out and halts me.

"Sebastian?" Emerald eyes look up at me.

"Yes miss Elizabeth?"

"Please, call me Lizzie." She smiles halfheartedly.

"Yes miss Lizzie?"

She hesitates for moment, chewing on her bottom lip like it is a stick of gum. "What happened to him?"

"What do you mean?"

"He seems…" She drifts off as her eyes move towards the sitting room. I place my hand on her shoulder.

"He is different." I agree with her unspoken words. "I understand that the two of you must have been very close?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Because you picked up on the change straightaway. However, with that, you can also help him reclaim what he has lost."

"How can I help him?"

"With just being yourself and no more." I smile. Her face lights up and she nods turning and skipping into the sitting room. As I follow behind her, I hear her mutter to herself.

"_Be myself, I can do that_."

I go into the kitchen to assist Tanaka in the final preparations in making the tea. As he has already warmed the pot, I spoon in the tea leaves, one for each person and one for the pot, I pour in the hot water and let it steep. Placing the pot on the silver trolley nearby, along with beautifully decorated plates of finger sandwiches, scones, clotted cream and a variety of preserves.

Wheeling it out of the kitchen, I stop before entering the room to take a deep breath and ready myself – this is my first real moment as a butler and I have a sense of pride when it comes to my work, no matter what I do. Entering the room, I see everyone is there, seated and mid conversation. My new master Ciel is sitting next to Lizzie, who's gleefully catching him up on all the schoolyard gossip since he's been away. He looks completely nonplussed but I'm not really sure if that's because he was homeschooled and may not know who these people are or he really doesn't care. I think it may be a mixture of both. His Aunt is sitting next to Dr. Durless, who has just arrived on a surprise visit. I see Tanaka has her lab coat draped over his right arm as he bows politely and takes it to her room.

As I pour the tea, I look over at his Aunts and wonder who Ciel takes after. He looks nothing like either of them, and their personalities don't seem to match either, but then again, I don't know what he used to be like before we met. The tea is poured and I watch anxiously as each person takes a sip. Ciel waits as he gauges everyone else's reactions – there are smiles after sips and the conversation goes back to normal. Holding his teacup under his nose, Ciel waves and inhales the vapors.

"What type of tea is this? It's light." He remarks as he examines the liquid.

"Empress Gray from Marks and Spencer. As clotted cream can be heavy, I have chosen a tea that was light and delicate without being to heavy on the palate or the tannins." I smile. Ciel blinks at me, astounded by my reply. Yep, nailed it. All of that research has paid off.

He takes a sip as he closes his eye, seemingly enjoying it.

"This is delicious." He resigns. That must've been hard for him, normally I'd let it go but I'm feeling playful.

"Thank you young master, I mean, if I couldn't make a decent cup of tea, then what sort of butler would I be?" I smirk. He snorts derisively as he rolls his eye.

As the afternoon wears on, all of the sandwiches are suitably devoured, the tea drunk and the conversation starts to repeat itself, Lizzie looks over to her mother – trying to catch her attention. Once she does, her mother nods her head and Lizzie leaps up and canters out of the room. A moment later, she comes back in with a large box in her arms and hands it to Ciel.

"Happy birthday Ciel." She declares with a broad grin.

I move over to the piano by the large bay window, lifting the lid, I take a seat and let my fingers to dangle over the keys as I start to play _happy birthday._ Everyone starts to sing-along and Ciel starts to blush.

"Happy birthday to you." The song finishes.

"Open it!" Lizzie insists. Ciel pulls on the light blue satin ribbon that surrounds the box and opens the lid. He pulls out a large stuffed rabbit and everyone holds their breath, it appears that the irony is not lost on them. The rabbit wears an eye patch over its right eye, and the same disaffected pout on its face, just like the boy holding it. "It's Bitter Rabbit!" Lizzie declares.

"I can see that." Ciel sits the rabbit on his knees as he examines it.

"Don't you remember? Uncle Vincent had two made for us and we used to play with them all of the time when we were little. _Remember_?" She enthuses.

Ciel is completely stoic as he touches the rabbits' eye patch. He observes Lizzies' face out of the corner of his eye.

"Don't you like it?" Her lip starts to quiver as she fights the urge to cry. Ciel, being a quick thinker, catches this and forces a bright smile on his lips.

"It's fantastic Lizzie, thank you." His smile is so sweet and innocent even I almost buy it, but, it isn't down to me, it's down to Lizzie to take the bait. Her eyes flicker with pure joy she throws her arms around him._ Well done, young master._

"Sebastian, can you play something a little more lively?" Dr. Durless asks. I nod and I start to play away on the keys.

…

Finally the day is over.

I have my young master bathed and tucked into bed, which concludes our evening routine. He hasn't asked me to sit with him tonight, which is fine as it allows me to complete my nighttime routine.

I do a sweep of the house to ensure that nothing is out of place or askew. I see a few dishes that need to be put in the kitchen, so I collect them and place them into the dishwasher.

"Oh!" I exclaim loudly as I walk over to a nearby cupboard. In the rush of the day, I have completely forgotten.

Opening the door, I pull out a beautifully decorated cake. It is a two layered cake, covered in chocolate ganache with the decorative hand piped white roses on the top. It's Ciels' favorite cake with his favorite flowers. I completely forgot to give this to him – not to mention that it is the first that cake I have ever made. It took a lot of work especially with the copious amounts of interruptions he causes but it looks beautiful and I'm immensely proud of it.

"Oh well." I sigh as I run my index finger along the bottom of the plate, collecting spare frosting that has spilled over, and lick my finger. Disgusting, I detest chocolate or anything sweet for that matter. Leaving the cake on the counter, I walk back into the sitting room to take a seat at the piano. I let my fingers spread out over the keys slightly touching them. A delicate trill comes out softly as the melody flits through the air; I play for a moment, as lightly as I can so as not to wake anyone. Not that they can hear me, though it is only a townhouse, this place is huge and the bedrooms are so far away that my gentle playing won't cause them to stir.

Closing my eyes I play gracefully and quietly as my fingers take flight and I feel the music through my fingertips.

"You're quite good." His voice reaches my ears and I stop.

"Young master-"

"Don't stop." He interrupts me. I look over to see him, just in his nightshirt and without an eye patch, leaning against the piano right next to me. "Please keep playing." His voice is soft and pleading, how can I say no?

"Any requests?" I smile at him; he walks behind me and sits next to me on the bench.

"Whatever you were just playing." His voice is almost whispering as I start to play again.

"Oh, well it's called I Was Lost Without You."

"I've never heard of it."

"I think it's from a video game."

"You play video games?"

"Not really, but sometimes they can provide good strategy planning."

He nods as I continue to play; he starts to yawn but manages to stay awake as he watches me.

"Can you play the piano?" I ask.

"I can kind of play the piano but I'm better at the violin. I want to keep playing but I need a tutor." He shrugs.

"I can tutor you in both. I'm quite good at musical instruments."

He tries to smile but yawns again instead; his eyes flutter slowly as they start to close. He must have been unable to sleep and too proud to tell me to stay and sit with him tonight. Why does he feel the need to rush becoming an adult? I wonder as his head rests against my arm.

I can't help but smile as I glance down at him.

"Happy birthday young master." I whisper.

"Thank you Sebastian." He replies with his eyes closed.

I stop playing for a moment as I think about how to collect him and take him back to bed. Moving my arm from underneath his head, which falls onto my chest, I wrap my arm around him and start to slide off of the bench.

"Young master, it's time for-" I stop.

It's like a sixth sense – a strong feeling I have in the pit of my stomach as my heart races.

_I hear something. _

A sharp crack of glass sounds from right behind us.

Holding him tightly, I surround Ciel and we fall to the ground as the sitting room is sprayed with bullets. Shattering the glass of the bay window and hitting the various pictures, vases and lamps that decorate the room. The bullets hit the pendant lamps that hang from the ceiling cloaking the room in darkness, save from some sparse light coming from outside.

Crawling to a pool of moonlight, I pull back for a moment, I check to see if Ciel is all right. His breathing is fast and labored as his eyes are wide with horror but there isn't a scratch on him. Falling back on him again, I try to move him along to get him out of here but I halt, there is consistent banging against the front door and finally it bursts open.

"Master, wrap your legs around my waist and your arms around my neck." I instruct into his ear. Ciel obeys and holds on to me tightly as I keep low to the ground and start to crawl to the other side of the room.

I stop.

The sound of heavy footsteps crunching on glass approaches us.

"_Ciel Phantomhive,_ I guess the rumors are true – you do live." He says.

"That's more than I can say about you if you don't leave." I bark.

"Leave? Who are you?"

"My name is Sebastian Michaelis and I am here to protect my young master. Now, if you don't get the fuck out of here in the next few seconds, I'll show you why he hired me." I calmly state. I really have no idea how to get out of this situation but I'm hoping he's cowardly enough to take the hint.

"Well then, _Sebastian Michaelis_, this is a birthday gift from my master to yours."

Cradling Ciel tightly in my arms, I manage to look up and stare straight down the barrel of his gun. I hear the click of the safety being released and I watch as he pulls the trigger and the bullet is discharged.

* * *

**Chapter playlist: **

Chapter title track: Snowden – Like Bullets

The song Sebastian plays: I Was Lost Without You – Sam Hulick


	5. Watercolour

_'Will you take me out of here? When I'm staring down the barrel? When I'm blinded by the lights? When I cannot see your face? Take me out of here…'_

…

"Well then, Sebastian Michaelis, this is a birthday gift from my master to yours."

Cradling Ciel tightly in my arms, I look up at the barrel of his gun.

_Tick follows tock follows tick follows tock._

My mantra, my ritual – it calms my mind and slows everything down, allowing me to think.

And my first thought is that this man is not like me.

He is not a killer.

He's struggling – I know it. If he were a killer, he wouldn't bother talking to us, he'd do what I do and just pull the trigger. However, I'll take his lack of experience and use it, as in that sentence, he didn't notice me slide my left foot out from underneath me as I now balance on my right.

I listen as I hear his thumb slide over the safety – it clicks as it releases. I watch as he squeezes his index finger around the trigger and the bullet is discharged.

I make a quick calculation as he pulls the trigger – judging by the distance of the barrel to the height of my raised back and the velocity at which the bullet is discharged, I only have one option. Kicking my right leg out, I fall flat on top of Ciel, he lets go of me as his lungs exhale under the weight of pressure and the bullet grazes past my shoulder – I'm hit.

I wince as the wound is deep and it burns. I can feel Ciels' whole body shake underneath me, I look at his face and he's completely terrified. Dipping my head back down I hug him slightly to calm the shaking and I turn my lips to his ear.

"_Trust in me_." I whisper. He nods frantically in acknowledgement. _Okay, here we go_.

Rolling off of him, I use the heel of my left foot, kicking it out and hitting him in the shin, driving into the bone, I listen out for a crack and drag my heel down to his ankle. I can't see the damage but the crack is there and I can smell fresh blood – excellent - it was a direct hit. He collapses, dropping to one knee as he holds his shin.

"Master, I've been shot! Go to kitchen." I declare but he hesitates, "Now!"

Scrambling to his feet, Ciel scurries out into the hall down towards the kitchen.

Judging by the choice of jean trousers he's chosen to wear, the scrape must burn like fuck, not to mention the break. I would chuckle at that fact but I've got to get his gun, which he is still clutching in his hand. I roll over onto my side and I start to stand.

"He's in the kitchen!" He shouts, looking over his shoulder and not paying attention to me. Ciel may have run towards the kitchen but I know he won't go in it. I've already prepared for something like this to happen and if it does, like now, Ciel knows to go anywhere than where I tell him to go. It's a distraction; actually, it's kettling, making them go into a room where I would have the advantage.

Now I chuckle, this man is an idiot. Just because I said I have been shot doesn't mean you've won.

I hear voices and clamoring as whomever he shouted to heads into the kitchen. Good, I've got to get in there.

"Now then, how shall we proceed?" I smirk as I hover above him. His eyes widen.

"H-how, I thought you-"

"Were shot? Yes, you shot me but you didn't kill me and that was your second mistake. Your first being coming into this house." I say as my eyes lock in with his as I start to squat down. He didn't notice my right hand slipping down just above his readying to take the gun.

He tries to raise his hand but it smacks into my palm and I hold his hand tightly into my, squeezing it. With my left hand, I reach out and grab his throat.

"Who hired you?" I ask calmly. His eyes start to tear, how sweet.

"H-he didn't give me a name. He j-just said that he was on behalf o-of someone else." He chokes out.

I roll my head back and to the side as I think about this.

Using his hand, I smack the handle of the gun against his damaged shin. He cries out and lets go of the gun into my hands.

I start to stand up, taking him with me as his throat is conveniently still in my hand.

"Why would you say this was a gift?"

"That's what he told me t-t-to say! Please, you have to believe me, I don't even know who you are, he just said: bring the kid!" He splutters.

"Okay." I shrug. Raising the gun, I clock him in the forehead with the butt and he passes out. "I'll let the cops deal with you." I quickly unload and drop the gun and then sprint towards the kitchen.

Entering the kitchen, the lights aren't on, but the moon through the blinds allows me to see there are three of them – easily done. I watch as they look around for Ciel but they can't find him, of course not, he's not here. Why would I announce where he would be hiding? _What is this? Amateur hour?_ I groan to myself, quietly. It doesn't really matter as it has done the trick; they're here and completely oblivious to my presence.

_Tick follows tock follows tick follows tock._

"Come out little boy, we're not going to harm you." One of the men calls out. _Yeah, like anyone would believe that._

_Tick._

I walk up behind one of them, wrapping my hands around the sides of his head, squeezing his cheeks, I twist his head sharply, breaking his neck and causing him to go limp in my hands and I guide him down to his knees quietly.

_Tock._

Crouching down I make my way around them, stopping just on the other side of the island counter in the middle of the kitchen. The pair don't seem to notice me, or the dead body of their colleague, as they walk around the island in front of me looking under the table and chairs.

"Mate, I don't think he's 'ere."

I ever so silently slide open a drawer and reach in, my fingers brushing against something cold and metal. I run them up whatever it is, and realize it's a razor sharp kitchen knife and it'll do nicely. Taking this, and a few more pieces of cutlery out of the drawer, I palm them and slide them up my sleeve.

"Fuck, we can't leave without 'im, dead or alive."

"Steve, what do you think?" I can't see who they're calling for, but I'm pretty sure _Steve_ is not going to reply.

_Tick_.

I close my eyes and focus as I can hear one of them walking around towards me.

Perfect.

Staying very low to the ground, I wait to pounce as he walks ever closer to me.

"Oh shit, Steve?" The first one stumbles on to the body of his fallen comrade.

"_Shhh…I hear something_." The second one whispers.

"Sebastian?"

Ciel! I hear his voice and soft footsteps as he enters the kitchen, what is he doing? He knows better than this! I crawl forward to see him stood by the door as he takes everything in; he's still shaking but standing firm – just as I would imagine him to.

"Ah, there you are kid, we've been looking for you." The second one purrs as the first one lunges forward and grabs Ciel, lifting him up off of his feet by his collar.

"Sebastian! Where are you?" He cries out.

_Tock._

Crawling further towards them, I drop one of the knives that I had hidden away into the palm of my hand.

"I'm right here young master." My voice is calm and honeyed in it's tone as I spring forward on my knees, using my knife to slice the right Achilles tendon of the second man causing him to scream out and fall over.

With the same knife, I pounce on top of him and plunge it into his chest. Blood splatters on the first man and over Ciel as I start to stand up and move towards them.

The man drops Ciel to his feet and turns to me as he tries to get his gun out of his back pocket. I drop down another piece of cutlery into my hand from my sleeve, I touch the tip of it with my index finger, and it's a fork this time.

"I thought you were shot!" Ciel exclaims in shock.

"I was shot and it hurts like fuck, get down!" I instruct and as he ducks, I take the fork and throw it at the man, hitting him square in the eyes. He too drops down and falls over just in front of Ciel. Not wanting to take any chances, I pull the fork out of his forehead and stab him in the chest with it as well.

Ciel completely collapses to his knees as he stares at me in repulsion on all fours.

"Is it – is it over?" He asks me, shaking.

"Yes young master," I nod, "it's all over now."

...

"The cops should be here shortly." I exhale as I lean over the kitchen table, completely exhausted.

I moved the bodies out of the kitchen and into the sitting room. Then Tanaka and I set about to cleaning and coming up with matched up statements for the police. Of course, it didn't really matter as this was an act of self-defense, there were guns but I used cutlery and besides, once they realize who the target was, they are sure to brush the whole thing under the carpet, especially as it was a matter for the underground and it concerned the last remaining '_untouchable_'.

"I still don't know why you called them. It's best if people didn't know I am still alive." Ciel huffs as he comes over to me.

"I hate to break it to you but I think the cat's already out of the bag." I stand upright and hobble slightly to a nearby chair and take a seat. I take off my coat as my shoulder is bothering me; it's throbbing and still sore.

"You're bleeding!" Ciel gasps as he lays eyes on my wound. I look over to my shoulder and nod.

"I guess I am. Well, that's what happens when you get shot, you bleed." I agree. "Is there a first aid kit around?"

"I'll ask Tanaka." He rushes off and out of the kitchen to find the old man who was no doubt guarding the bodies in the front room. My eyes trail after him as he goes out, his nightshirt still spotted and stained with someone else's blood. My first thought is how am I going to get these stains out of that nightshirt? I may have to get him a few more and with that, I emit an airy chuckle. When did this happen? It's only been a month and I'm already thinking like a butler. I wonder when the change happened? It's all happened so fast that I didn't even realize it.

As I muse over my newfound self, Ciel returns to the kitchen, lugging a big green bag with a white cross on the front of it. Sitting it down on the table, he starts to rifle through it, pulling out a bottle of antiseptic solution, gauze, tape, white crepe bandages, scissors and various other items I don't think I'll need. Reaching over and grabbing the antiseptic bottle, I put it in my mouth and use my teeth to unscrew the lid. My eyes wander over to Ciel who is standing with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face.

"What?" I mumble as I spit the lid out of my mouth.

"I was going to take care of that for you." He mutters and I do everything in my power not to laugh at him. I see that he can tell, as his face flushes crimson and his hands clench into fits, held tightly at his side.

"This from the boy who cannot even dress himself?"

"Well, my Aunt _is _a doctor."

"So you think you've learned how to do this by osmosis?" I lightly chuckle. Ciel looks as though he's going to punch me with his tiny, ineffectual, balled up fists.

"No! I know how to dress a wound; I've seen it done before." He snorts; I can see something click behind his eyes as he realizes something and a wave of sadness comes across his face. "I used to watch my mother do this for father sometimes." He recalls.

I don't know what to say.

He barely brings up his parents, as it must be hard for him, but sometimes it's like they don't even exist. With Dr. Durless' blessing, Tanaka had removed any family pictures and placed them somewhere where Ciel wouldn't find them – almost as though looking at them would be too much for him.

I clench my fist and measure the amount of pain I'm in. It hurts but it's not too bad, deep superficial wound at best.

"Okay, you can tend to it." I decide. His whole face brightens up as he snatches the antiseptic from me and takes some gauze pads from off of the table. I watch him out of the corner of my eyes as he haphazardly pours the liquid onto the pads, spilling some onto the floor. "How many times have you seen this done?"

"Enough." He shrugs, "now take off your shirt." I hesitate, as I'm really unsure about this. I know it isn't a deep wound but still, I don't want an infection, no matter how much antiseptic solution he puts on it. "Sebastian, _this in an order_, take off your shirt and let me treat you." Ciel frowns.

It's an order now is it? It's my first one since I signed my contract.

I exhale loudly and feebly attempt to unbutton my shirt, sliding it off of my shoulders. Using his free hand, he guides it the rest of the way down my arm and back then starts getting to work on treating my wound, dabbing at it with the antiseptic soaked gauze pad very roughly. Wincing from the burning of the solution and the sheer gruffness of his actions, I think Ciel must have seen my face. The dabbing becomes much gentler and he blows on the wound between each touch in an attempt to soothe the burning sensation.

Looking over at him again, I can't help but feel warmed by this. I've been injured more times than I can count but no one has ever treated me before, let alone offered. Watching his typically scowling face scrunch up, his normally pouting lips part as his little pink tongue pokes out in concentration makes want to chuckle – of course, I don't, I just let him carry on with the task at hand.

"So, you didn't like the rabbit Miss Lizzie got you?" I ask as he starts to put the dressing on, fussing over exactly how it should sit on my shoulder.

"It's not that I didn't like it, I like it just fine. It's just that it's a toy for a child." He groans.

"Are you not a child?"

He stops for a moment to think, and then continues to apply more dressing.

"I suppose I am in age alone but no, I do not consider myself to be a child." He replies.

"Then what are you?" I wonder curiously. The tape is coming out now, and he cut strips off and smoothes them against the dressing on my shoulder.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you're not a man – not yet at least."

"I am an adult. If you knew..." He trails off for a moment and I suspect he's thinking about the last few months he spent in captivity.

"It's all right; you don't have to tell me." I attempt to defuse the tension.

He stops for a second, keeping his eyes down towards the table as he traces his fingers over the blades of scissors as though he is in a trance. His past must haunt him terribly - I want to know about it, all of it but I can wait until he wants to tell me – that is – if he ever does.

"Young master?" I speak gently so as not to spook him. It seems to work as he snaps out of it and picks up a dry gauze pad, placing it over my wound and holding it there as he gets more tape and sticks it in place. He works quietly but quickly as he keeps applying more gauze and tape, it's fine, I'll leave it for now but I will have to redress it later.

Once he finishes, he stands back and admires his work. He emits a low hum as he thinks of something. Coming towards me, Ciel places on hand on my chest, the base of his palm was warm considering he was barely wearing a slip of anything. Putting his other hand on the edge for balance, Ciel leans into me, closes his eyes and ever so tenderly kisses the dressed wound on my shoulder; his long eyelashes sweep over my skin.

I am thoroughly dumbstruck.

He looks at me and reads my reaction curiously.

"What is the matter?"

"Why did you do that?" I manage to splutter out as any other type of words escape my mind.

"Is that not what you are supposed to do? I've seen my mother do this many times whenever my father or I were injured." He states quite matter of fact. My face softens as I smile at him.

"Okay, I understand now. Your mother was kissing your 'boo-boo'." I know I must sound detached but I'm not fond of human physical contact, no matter what it is meant as. I can appreciate why he did it; it was sweet, though oddly affectionate, especially given the nature of our relationship but it was what he learned from his mother.

"Master, why don't you ever talk about your parents?" I ask.

His mouth drops open to reply but he hesitates.

"What the _hell _happened here?"

We both look over towards the door and there stands Dr. Durless, just back from work, her red lacquered nails digging into her sides as she places her hands firmly on her hips. There is a look of anger and complete bewilderment on her face.

"Sebastian, a word", she says sternly.

I slide off of the chair, tossing my bloodied shirt back up and over my shoulders and I start to walk towards her. As I do, Ciel comes into full view as he steps beside me but slightly behind as he follows. Her eyes land on him and widen in horror as she rushes over to him, pulling at his nightshirt and searching his body.

"Oh my God! Ciel! Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." He pushes her hands off of him. "There isn't a scratch on me."

"But you're covered in-"

"Somebody else's blood Aunt Anne." He smiles, "I assure you, I'm perfectly fine." His eyes flicker over towards me and hers' follow in the same direction. I nod to confirm, I did my job, I protected him and she need not worry but still, she frowns.

"Ciel, stay here. Sebastian, hallway – _right now_." She barks.

I do as she instructs and follow her into the hallway. I lean against the wall as she paces back and forth, gnawing on the nail of her middle finger as she thinks.

"Well?"

"It seems the young masters' attempt to keep the fact that he is alive a secret has been thwarted."

"What do you mean?"

"Dr. Durless, I've been meaning to ask this, what do you know about the Phantomhives?"

She stops pacing for a moment and goes silent.

"So you know." She sighs after a while.

"It is my duty to know everything, especially if I am to protect the young master with my life." I respond.

"Sebastian, you have to stop him." Her eyes look at me, pleadingly.

"I don't know how." I answer truthfully.

"Find a way, _any way_. This is not the life I want for him… I saw how my sister was and…" Looking at her, her face sinks like her voice and she becomes distant. "I can't bear it, if he follows the same path as his father, I just can't. He's the only family I have left. Please Sebastian, _please_, you have to stop him – make him see sense." She begs.

"That's not his decision to make." Ciel interrupts.

Moving away from the wall, I stand upright as I see him come up beside us; his arms are crossed over his chest as he stands in front of us.

"Ciel, please, I'm only doing this for your own good!"

"My own good?"

"You could have died tonight." She reaches out and touches his cheek.

"But I didn't, Sebastian protected me." He replies sharply as he side steps her action. "I could have died many times over but I didn't. This is who I am, this is who I have become and _this is now my job_. There is no way I'm running away from it."

I can see Dr. Durless' eyes start to well up with tears as she sweeps the ruby red fringe from her forehead in frustration.

"But you're a child." She tries to reason.

"No. I am head of the Phantomhive Family and all that entails. I have been preparing for this since my birth – and I am _not _a child." He snaps as he turns towards the end of the hall. "Come Sebastian, I believe the police are here to clean up this mess."

His tone is sharp and remarkably different to the sweet boy who delicately kissed my wound not five minutes ago. Now, he seems aloof and cold as we walk towards the sitting room to greet the police.

I follow after him as he struts, just casting my eyes over my shoulder to Dr. Durless, who is crying, tears falling down her cheeks as her eyes remain focused on him.

This is not the life she wants for her nephew and I can understand that. This would not be the life I'd want for him either, if I were her – however, I'm glad he's chosen it. The more time I spend with Ciel, the more I admire him and his brazen tenacity. His unwavering need for revenge is something I desire, in fact – I crave it.

His soul is dark, twisted and tainted – yet, it's equally childlike and innocent, such a rare dichotomy existing in one being – it's delicious. So foolish and yet so admirable, just thinking about it makes my mouth water. Still, I feel I must reconfirm if the strength of his convictions continue to ring true.

"Young master, what if your Aunt is right."

"What are you talking about?"

"You're 'alive' now, which means you'll have your wealth, status and all entitlements reinstated to you. Why would you throw all of that away for something as foolish as revenge? Why not just start living?"

We get to the edge of the hallway and he suddenly stops, keeping his back to me and letting out an airy chuckle.

"You know, you're probably right." He agrees. My heart sinks as the creature I started to admire and whose need for revenge I desire so greatly seems to be letting doubt set in. "But," He begins again, turning to face me. "I didn't hire you because I wanted those things, I hired you because I want to fight and now that whoever did this to me and my family know I am alive, there is nowhere to go but forward. I will fight each and every last one of them and I will get my revenge!" His voice is firm without a trace of doubt, his back is straight and his head is high as he stares me straight in the eyes.

There he is, this beautiful creature, without hesitation he joins me in the darkness, turning his back to the light. He could have everything he could ever want in this world twice over, but the only thing he wants is revenge. I have had many clients over the years who have sought the same, the majority with reasons that are so petty, they seem like children who want a settling of scores after a school yard scrap. However Ciel is the only one who understands what it means to want revenge, true retribution, he is ready to charge into this abyss at speed with such dignity and bloodlust.

He is perfect and single minded, so beautiful and so imprudent.

"Sebastian." He calls me, my eyes lock into his, unwavering. "This is an order, I trust you to be my solider. You will be fighting for me, being my sword and my shield - _and you will bring me victory_." He growls so low that it sends a sharp shiver up my spine.

I immediately drop down on my left knee, crossing my left arm over my heart as I bow my head and take his right hand into mine

"Yes young master, I will continue to fight for you and I will definitely deliver you the laurel of victory. On my own I life, I swear it." I trail my thumb over his knuckles before I lightly touch my lips to them, confirming my statement.

Ciel Phantomhive, I now know what you ask of me and I can deliver, but do you know? Do you know what road you're destined to walk down and to what end you're seeking? Do you know that everyone you know will start to fall by the wayside and eventually; you'll be forced to walk this road alone? Do you know that this crown you so desperately seek is full of nothing but despair?

Yes, you must know, of course you know but you seek it anyway – how foolish but how beautiful.

* * *

**Chapter title track:** Pendulum – Watercolour


	6. Ooh La La

**Authors' note: **_Sorry folks, this is a long chapter. I was going to cut it half but I kinda like it as a whole, so, apologies – I know people like shorter chapters._

**Warning(s):** Drug use, implied underage drug use, underage drinking and implied sexual abuse of minors.

…

'_Switch me on, turn me up… Oh child of Venus you're just made for love…'_

…

Walking into the sitting room, I cast my eyes around. I see the coroners bagging the bodies, the plain clothes officers bent over and studying the bullet fragments that were found scattered throughout and Tanaka, who is standing by the window regurgitating the story we had made up as he "assisted" the police with their investigation. As the lights were shot out, they have set up makeshift floodlights that fill the room with such brightness; it is like standing in the middle of a football pitch.

I decide to join Tanaka and confirm our rehearsed statements.

Once finished and the officer, seemingly satisfied, dismisses us. We start to walk away and Tanaka quickly slips something into the palm of my hand. Running my thumb over it, I realize that it's a medical gauze patch. I look over at him, nod my acknowledgement and then I look for Ciel.

I find him standing by the coroners as they zip up the last body and wheel it outside on the trolleys. Walking just behind him, I watch as he starts to move away, oblivious of my presence.

"Young master." I mutter under my breath, Ciel stops and turns to me as I show him the eye patch. He nods and I hand it over to him. He puts it over his eye, slipping the loops that fix it to his face over his ears and smoothing his hair over it.

Ciel moves around the room as he inspects the damage and I follow after him until a firm grip lands on my shoulder, halting me.

"I should have guessed that this would be your handiwork." He scoffs from behind me. I dip my head, nodding slightly as I smile to myself; the voice is rude but very familiar.

"And I should have guessed that you'd be the first one here. Still desperate to make a name for yourself, I see." I retort snidely.

"Do you two know each other?" Ciel inquires from beside us.

"In a way. Young master, may I introduce Detective Chief Inspector William T. Spears? DCI Spears, this in my master and head of the Phantomhive Family, Ciel Phantomhive."

"Ciel Phantomhive? No, you're supposed to be dead."

"I can assure you DCI Spears, I'm very much alive."

"How are you here and why his he here?"

"I am here because he saved me and this is my Aunt, Dr. Durless' home. If you have any questions, you can find her in the kitchen." Ciel retorts.

"And I am here because of the contract I made with my master." I simply reply.

DCI Spears looks irritated and confused as he slides his glasses up the bridge of his nose and glares at me.

"Contract?" He snorts. My mouth drops open to reply.

"Yes, as long our contract is in place, Sebastian belongs to me." Ciel interjected.

"Who is Sebastian?"

"I am, as that is the name my master gave me on the day we met." I smile.

"Your master?" He snorts derisively. "So you retired _Black Cat_?"

"Black Cat?" Ciel interrupts.

"That is the name this demon goes by or used to, didn't you know?" He asks sarcastically, knowing Ciel wouldn't have known my former identity.

Ciel looks over to me curiously but shrugs his tiny shoulders.

"What does it matter? He is Sebastian now and that's how he'll stay until our deal is done."

"You've made a deal with a demon - are you really that desperate?"

"For what I want to achieve, a demon, _as you call him_, is just what I need."

"I cannot think of anything worse than an unfettered demon to have on your side."

"I can't think of anything better." Ciel quips.

"I can assure you DCI Spears, I am very much so fettered by my master. I am in his complete control as per the terms of our contract."

"I can't say I like this at all."

"I can't say that I care about your opinion, now if you'll excuse me." Ciel flashes him the brightest, most charming and childlike smile that would shame the sun if it shone outside and walks towards the hallway.

"We're not done here." He calls after him.

"My master must be tired, it is late after all." I grin, trying to keep as straight a face as possible.

"What do you gain doing this? Serving a child."

"I'll have you know, my master is no child, he is the head of the Phantomhive Family and all that entails." I smirk; regurgitating a line from the speech Ciel had given me a little while ago. I take a step towards him and now we are face to face. "What I gain is something someone like you will never understand." I finish as I turn and walk away.

"This isn't over _Black Cat_. I'm going to watch every move you make." He hisses.

"It never is DCI Spears and I would expect nothing less." I say over my shoulder as I follow my master into the hall.

"Sebastian." His voice is low but his tone is sharp.

"Yes my young master?"

"Black Cat?"

"A previous life."

Ciel hums and nods, then he turns his head over his shoulder, looking at me.

"Do not keep anymore secrets from me – this is an order."

"Yes master."

"Black Cat, _honestly._ Couldn't you have thought of something more, I don't know – bad ass than that?" He scoffs.

"What can I say? I really like cats." I shrug as I follow him down the hall and towards his bedroom.

...

A few weeks later, we find ourselves walking at speed down a relatively busy High Street, and I push past the other pedestrians as I follow a rather hurried Ciel down the street.

"Where are we going?" I ask as I trail behind him slowly, especially as one of my normal paced strides is three of his. He hasn't let me in on the reason for this secret adventure only where to park the car. I'm quite curious, as this is the first time he has ventured outside of the townhouse since I brought him home that night a few months back. Perhaps that is the reason behind this rush to get to wherever he is trying to get to. Maybe he's developed some type of agoraphobia? I really don't know.

"We're going to see an informant of my predecessors'." He replies. "I've already been in contact with him so he knows to expect us."

It's curious whenever he speaks of his parents now, he calls his father his predecessor and he doesn't speak of his mother at all. Ciel seems so closed off these last couple of weeks; it's been hard to get an accurate read on him. I know that his nightmares are getting worse but since his birthday, he's not had me stay with him. I don't offer either, although I do however, stand outside of his door at night - sometimes for the whole night just in case he needs me but he never calls on me.

Instead, he thrashes away in his sleep and calls out for someone, who? I wish I knew. Probably someone he met whilst in that hellhole but I don't ask him. All I can gather is that there was a promise that he would be protected but that person may be no more as he screams something then goes quiet – only to go through the whole event again and again.

Ciel is an enigma, and a complicated one at that.

I'm normally quite adept at sensing a way through these things, but he confuses me with each move he makes. It's been two months now and our relationship has gone from strength to strength. I think I've matured into a proper butler (not without constant research and development) and Ciel has matured into a formidable head of a Family. I am nothing but impressed in how this child, _excuse me_, this young man has just stepped into his fathers shoes, with the gravitas of a man much older than his years, and taken complete control.

The biggest change is the matter of trust; Ciel seems to trust me implicitly now.

Tanaka acts as his proxy for any matters concerning his controlling stake in the Funtom Company; however, he now tends to ask for my guidance. As I don't know the first thing in running a billion pound company, I'm afraid any suggestion I make is a small one and relatively inconsequential. I'm sure he knows all of this, however, but still his desire to make sure I'm in the loop hasn't gone unnoticed - especially not by me or anyone else for that matter.

With that being said, I serve a greater function to him than an ideas sounding board. Whenever there is business concerning the underground, I'm there.

I don't know why but I half expected to be Diane Keaton at the end of The Godfather. It's the scene when Michael shuts the door on her and out of 'family' business, but no; I'm in the room. I've never been on this side before, and I must say that I normally would be fighting against the 'Mob', but now I'm here, it seems that is who they are also fighting against. It's odd, even though I read the journal; I seem to not understand what it is they actually do, but I'm learning.

The Phantomhives keep the peace in the underworld, they are like the guard dogs and enforcers – making sure no one steps out of line, a sort of modern day Murder Inc. Especially because if anything does spill out into the open that's when the police get involved. Not that they don't have some of them as members of their Network and in their pockets as well. They do their job effectively; Ciel is in control of not only the Family but also the whole Network to boot.

He has a vast list of informants and people on his books that owe him and his Family many favors. I have to be careful, as steeped into my own morals and rules as I am – I find myself easily swayed into their world. I find the whole thing exotic and fun, to say the least. It's steady work and much better than just being a typical gun for hire.

"Young master, I know you said we were going to an informant but where? I feel like I could have parked closer."

"We're going to the Undertakers."

_An undertaker? _

Finally, he stops in front of a shop and I look up to read the sign: _Undertaker_. The outside of the stone building is very old looking - it must be Grade 1 listed as it's incredibly Victorian looking but kept in excellent condition. There are two large windows in the front showing off various tombstones and wreath decorations.

Going inside, we stand and wait in the foyer. The first thing I notice is how shadowy the place is. There are dark wooden floors and a black carpet runner that goes down the center of the room, dividing it. There is a medium sized dark stained wooden table in the center of it with a centerpiece of while calla and stargazer lilies in a clear circular glass vase. Along the walls, there are rows of coffins everywhere on display. This place is definitely an undertakers; I had thought for sure it was code for something.

As we wait, my ears pick up on the music being piped in over the speakers, it's like music you'd hear in posh lifts but this is oddly familiar. _It isn't, is it? It is…! it's (Don't Fear) The Reaper from Blue Öyster Cult._ I muse to myself quietly.

Placing the side of the knuckle of my index finger to my lips, I attempt to stifle the snigger that's simmering within me. Although I can't help but sing along to the words in my mind which then causes me to emit a light chuckle.

"What's so funny?" Ciel raises an eyebrow at me; the stern look on his face is scolding my behavior.

"Nothing young master, it's just that I think I get this guys' sense of humor."

"Well I'm glad somebody can." A voice titters from behind us. We turn to see a man in an impeccably tailored ebony black three-piece suit with a white shirt and a skinny black tie around his throat. He has very long silvery grey colored hair that is tied back but his long fridge sweeps across his face, covering his eyes, although, I can see a glint of greenish yellow pupils underneath all that hair.

"Hello Undertaker." Ciel greets him; the man then puts his hand on his heart and bows.

"Young Phantomhive, how nice to see you again, even if it's under inauspicious circumstances." He bends upright and steps towards us, standing right in front of Ciel.

"Yes, well." Ciel mumbles, "I understand you handled the funeral of my predecessor," he pauses and adverts his eyes from Undertaker, "thank you."

"It was not a problem, I was happy to do it." He giggles, which I found to be very inappropriate considering the topic of conversation. "I loved your parents you know."

Ciel nods, "I know."

Undertaker slides his index finger across his bottom lip as he thinks for a moment.

"You look a lot like him, you know, Vincent. Handsome man, handsome child." He swoons as he reaches out and touches Ciels' cheek, causing him to grimace. "So, now you're head of the Family, mazel tov." He chortles as he leans against the table. "Is that why you're here? _Ooo,_ I heard someone tried to put a hit on you, didn't they?"

"They tried but thanks to Sebastian, they were unsuccessful."

"Sebastian?" He turns to me, "_Oh yes_, I heard that you got the infamous Black Cat collared and leashed to you."

Ciels' head snaps over to me. "How does everyone know you're Black Cat?"

"Oh, Black Cat is a legend my dear boy, I'm surprised you don't know. I've never seen him in person but he has come up in conversation once or twice especially as he's one of the most sought after assassins in the underground, wouldn't you say... _Sebastian_?" He lets my name drip off of his tongue like runny honey.

"I won't deny it." I shrug.

Of course I won't deny it because it's more than true. I started at such a young age that I was able to build up such a reputation, that reputation always preceded me. What can I say; I'm good at what I do, especially if what I do is killing.

"Well, in any case, if you want my information, you know what the price is." Undertaker smiles with his whole mouth, flashing pearly white teeth.

"What's that?" Ciel sighs, motioning me to come over to him with his left hand.

"My price? A laugh, my dear boy, that's all I ever require." He giggles.

"A laugh? Like a joke?"

"Well, it has to be a really good joke."

"I'm afraid I don't have much of a sense of humor these days." Ciel replies almost sadly.

"Then what about you kitty, have you a sense of humor? I'm in need of a good laugh."

_Kitty?_

"Yes, I have a sense of humor." I smile, well I don't really but I'll give it a try.

"Okay, prove it to me. I request a light rib tickling and you can have all the information I have today." He bargains.

Okay something humorous; I think I can handle that.

"What is a polygon?" I ask.

Undertaker shrugs, "A dead parrot."

"You've heard it?"

"_Everyone _has heard it. Nice effort kitty but that was terrible." Undertaker gives off an embarrassed laugh for my poor effort, "Come on, try again."

"I guess it cannot be helped." I sigh as I try and think of something else that he may find humorous and won't already know. I step behind Ciel and cover his ears as I start to tell the filthiest and most perverted joke I can think of.

When I finish, Undertaker clutches his sides and howls with laughter at my joke. Personally, I didn't think it was all that good but I knew it would do the trick. Watching Undertaker burst into tears, Ciel fights out of my grip and moves forward.

"Well?" He arches an eyebrow at the lunatic.

"Yes, yes, I deem your offering worthy."

There is something strange and uncomfortable about being here in this place with this man. I can't seem to get a read on him. He is eccentric to say the least but he keeps leering at Ciel, which makes me feel extraordinarily protective of him, and so I stay directly by his side ready to pounce, if need be.

"You know, I feel like things are always interconnected." He begins. "From the national grid providing each of us light and electricity, connecting us to one another, to the people we meet. That person you meet might know someone else who knows someone else who knows you – all related."

"What are you on about?" Ciels' temper is starting to fray.

"What I'm on about my dear boy is interconnections and how we all relate to one another. You were being put up for auction, is that right?" Ciels' face falls as he thinks about that time. "Oh my - where are my manners? Would anyone like a cup of tea? I've made these fantastic biscuits, you must try them."

After he has made tea, we all reconvene back in what he affectionately calls 'the weeping room'. It's a quiet place where the grieving, unable to deal with a public display of emotions retire to. As he has few rooms at his disposal, this one is also being utilized to hold stock, and there are a lot of coffins stacked about.

Ciel sits on top of an ebony and silver coffin, looking horribly uncomfortable, clutching a mug – shaped as a beaker – of tea, with the bag still in it. Undertaker passes him a plate of bone shaped biscuits and he politely accepts.

"Well, where were we? Oh yes, the auction. As you know kitty, not everyone died there, and one of those who survived works on behalf of others who had an interest in what was on the block at auction, like a broker."

"An interest in me?"

"Well, you and some others. You were the big draw that night though, that's why they were saving you for last. Hell, if you weren't so expensive, I would have bid on you." He jokes. Reading our reactions to his comment, Undertaker shakes his head and continues. "Have you ever heard about Aleister Chamber?"

"He has been in the news a few years ago – over what, I don't remember." I respond.

"Aleister Chamber used to be a GP but he lost his license due to, let's just say questionable behavior, not with his patients but in his private life. All alleged of course."

"Of course." I mimic.

Undertaker sits on the brown wooden coffin opposite us, taking a biscuit in his fingertips. He crosses his legs and leans back on his elbows, lightly nibbling on the rounded part of the snack.

"He settled out of court an awful lot, the British Medical Association saw him to be a liability and what can they say? Mud sticks." He chuckles.

"What happened to him after that?" Ciel asks.

"He did what any morally bankrupt person would do, he went into the banking industry and made a killing in the stock market. When the recession hit, it didn't even affect him, he was bullet proof – truly finding his calling." Undertaker quips.

"How is Chamber connected to me?"

"How he is connected to you, well, there's the rub."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that the dubious circumstances that surround those allegations and lawsuits surround underage minors." Ciel clutches his tea beaker tightly as he starts to put two and two together. "My connections say that he knew the auctioneer that meet an untimely demise."

"The auctioneer was Nogoyev, you mean he was connected to him?" I surmise.

"Exactly kitty."

"If Chamber knew Nogoyev, then that means that he must be-"

"Exactly. He had a whimsical name for each one he bought from him too."

"And what was that?" I wonder.

"He'd call them his little songbirds. A bit innocuous but when you go through as many as he did, learning their names would be too difficult."

"And what would happen to them?" Ciel inquires, slightly agitated.

"Young master." I can see his breath quicken and his skin flush. I can't hear it but I'm sure his heart must be pounding.

"They met the same end each time, he broke them."

Ciel stares at him blankly and Undertaker draws his index finger over his throat, indicating that they all died and that Chamber may have been the one who killed them.

"How do we get him?" Ciel says resolutely.

"Well, you're in luck – in two weeks time, Chamber is having one of his 'lost weekend' parties at his estate in Kent. It's full of nothing but sex, drugs and debauchery and I can get you in."

"I'll find a way of getting him."

"Oh, you alone won't do." Undertaker stands up from the coffin and I turn from Ciel to him.

"I don't understand." Ciel sits the untouched tea beaker down and also stands up.

"As much as he likes 'em young, you, my dear boy, are not his type. Mine - yes, him - nope." He smiles as he takes one step forward. I instinctively step in front of Ciel who just walks around me.

"What does that mean, I'm not his type?" He asks spuriously.

"What he means, young master, is that Chamber prefers young girls."

"And that, you are not." Undertaker chuckles as he continues to eye Ciel under his sweeping fringe.

"Well thank you Undertaker you have been most helpful." Ciel smiles for the first time today.

"Always a pleasure, young Phantomhive, always a pleasure."

Ciel turns to leave, walking towards the curtained exit that covers the threshold.

"Oh, Ciel." Undertaker calls out, Ciel stops but keeps his head facing forward. "I'll extend the same warning I'd given your father. You should be careful gambling your soul away like this." He warns, and then pauses for a moment. "You know, I made a pretty coffin just for you and I was happy that it wasn't utilized. I really hope for you to never use it – at least – not in my lifetime." Ciel snorts and continues to walk out towards the door. "He's your responsibility now, kitty. Look after him for me."

"On my life." I nod as I exit the weeping room for the parlor.

As we exit the funeral parlor, Ciel doesn't seem to be walking back to the car so quickly. It isn't though he is strolling; he just seems to be taking his time, ruminating about what Undertaker had said to him.

To be honest, I'm thinking too.

Undertaker said something but he never finished what he was trying to say. There was someone who was interested in buying Ciel at the auction, a broker who lived. Is he too, connected with Aleister Chamber? I'll have to do some research – some one must know who was at that party.

"I'll do some reconnaissance work before I go to the party and-"

"We." He interjects.

"We?"

"I'm going too." He partially demands.

"Oh no you're not. This can be too dangerous for-"

"I swear to God Sebastian, if you call me a child or a boy I'll kick you in the shin." He threatens.

"I wasn't going to say that but it is dangerous for you, and besides, it'll be easier for me to get my information from him if you're not there distracting me."

"Distracting you?" He stops.

I sigh heavily as I don't want this to turn into a massive strop in the middle of the High Street.

"What I mean is your safety is my primary concern, I'll be too busy trying to make sure nothing happens to you instead of concentrating on the job at hand."

"Well, that's too bad because I'm going." He harrumphs, folding his arms tightly across his chest.

"Let me guess, this is an order?"

"Yes."

I think for a moment. Perhaps I can use Ciel as an advantage here?

"Well then, if that is the case, it must be done my way – understood?"

"If you insist. What do you have in mind?" His lips start to smile slightly; I can see he's excited that he's coming along.

"We'll have to set a honey trap for him."

"Honey trap?"

"Yes and young master, you're going to have to play along."

"Fine. It can't be too bad right?"

...

Knocking on his bedroom door, I wait a moment before I enter with the garment back draped over my forearm. Entering, I can see Ciel sitting on the bed, leaning back and thinking with a completely disaffected look on his made up face. He looks even more doll like than usual; his eyes are encircled with heavy black smoky kohl and light rouge on his cheeks. His lips are stained in a seductive pinky red and glossed with a cherry colored and flavored balm, which gives him even more of a pout.

He is wearing a long-haired wig that matches the slate of his own hair color. It is styled in two long pigtails that curl at the end, and with a sweeping side fringe that covers his right eye - that way, he doesn't have to wear an eye patch. He looks more than beautiful; he looks fragile and delicate, like something you would put on display – even in his white dressing gown.

"Young master, here is the dress Nina has made for you."

"You're not taking pictures. I don't care _what_ she wants them for." He snaps at me.

"I think she only wants them for her portfolio."

"Even worse!"

"Still, she was kind enough to style your hair and make-up."

"This is humiliating." He sighs.

"You said you wanted to come." I smirk, just not able to help myself.

"Not as a girl!"

"Well, this is how we set up a honey trap and if Chamber likes young girls then we'll give him one." I reason.

Sliding off of the bed, he stands in front of me as I lay the garment bag down and unzip it. From what I've been told by Nina, who is not only a first-rate stylist but also designer and tailor, the dress she has made is bang on trend – whatever that means. All I know is that as I slip it out of it's protective casing, is that it's definitely provocative.

Pulling the zipper down in the back I hold it open and Ciel steps into it, sliding the robe off of his narrow shoulders and dropping it to the floor as I pull the dress up his torso, put his arms through arm holes and zip up the back. As soon as I'm finished, Ciel struts over to the full-length mirror on the door of the wardrobe and admires himself. I must say, the dress is quite captivating on him. It's a light pink satin sleeveless extremely tight bodycon dress with a hemline that just about covers his backside. The neckline has this white and black ruffle that runs along it and down the v shape of the back.

Ciel runs his hands over the dress to feel the texture of the fabric and he smiles.

"Will this do?" He asks as he watches me in the mirror.

I simply nod.

Yes, it'll do nicely.

…

The ride up to the party is quiet but tense, it is really make or break. We can either get caught or something can happen to Ciel but hopefully, neither of these things will happen.

Our plan is simple – have Ciel get Aleister alone so we can trap him, that sounds simple enough but it is easier said than done. Undertaker said that Chamber is attracted to young girls but what if Ciel isn't the type he goes for? It doesn't really matter, all I want to do is trap him, once we do – the interrogation can begin.

After an hours drive through London and into the county of Kent, the anxious tension is certainly starting to build. Ciel keeps fiddling with the stone set ring on his thumb, spinning it around as he stares vacantly out of the window as I drive.

"You remember what you have to do right?"

"Yes, I need to get Aleister alone."

"Exactly. You don't need to worry about anything, I'll follow you every step of the way and if you need me to step in – just call my name and I'll be there."

"I know." He nods.

"You trust me don't you?"

"I trust you with my life Sebastian." He confirms and that is all I want to hear.

Driving down the long stretch of road onto the Chamber estate Ciel draws in a sharp intake of breath as we pull up to the house. It is huge, immaculately landscaped with trees and exotically shaped topiary.

Pulling up to the front, I get out and hand the keys over to a sharply dressed valet. Walking to the other side, I open the door for Ciel and one shapely leg after the other comes out of the passenger side and he appears, causing the other valets to gasp and whistle under their breathes. Our driver gets into the car and drives it over to the parking area next to the lot full of Maseratis, Ferraris and other costly super cars.

Arm in arm, I escort Ciel up the steps of the estate and towards the entrance. The first thing we hear is a heavy rhythmic synth beat that is blasting out so loudly that the ground is vibrating.

Walking into the house it is immaculate, all white and gold furnishings with white marble statues of naked female forms scattered around the room. That is what we see; this definitely is a party for those wanting to lose their senses for a weekend. There are half naked women walking around, serving alcohol and hors d'oeuvres to various people as well as girls of a questionable age. They are milling around and look completely vacant, some are talking to other members of the party whilst being fondled and the others looked completely out of it as they drink, rut and grind against each other on the dance floor in front of us.

Ciel looks disgusted and horrified as he clutches onto my arm tightly, sticking to my side like glue. Looking around, I can't spot Undertakers' description of Chamber but I'm sure he's around here somewhere, we just need to draw him out – we need to create a scene big enough to bring him to us.

Then it hits me.

I wiggle out of Ciels' vice like grip on my arm and bend over to whisper in his ear, although, with how loud the music is, the whisper became more of a shout.

"Can you dance?" I ask.

"Can I what?" He repeats.

"_Can you dance_?"

"What would I need to dance for?" Ciel retorts incredulously.

"Aleister must be attracted to you so you need to seduce him."

"Seduce him? I'm wearing a bloody dress…!" He strops.

"I'm afraid the dress alone won't entice him. There are a lot of people at this party, we need to come up with another tactic if you want to draw him into you."

"Fine." He resigns. I motion for him stay put and I walk over to the DJ and request a song. He smiles and nods as he looks over at Ciel and licks his lips.

"Yeah mate, I get it." He grins. _Pervert._

Well, this is it – it's make or break if we're going to get Aleisters' attention. I look around to see the party goers mingling, drinking shots and snorting blow off of any flat surface available, which includes the stomachs and chests of these young underage girls.

This place is full of deplorable behavior and I can't wait to get Ciel far from here but then my eye catches him. Leaning against the wall, feigning interest in the big-breasted dizzy blonde next to him and staring straight at a fidgeting Ciel – it is our mark.

He is a tall man, light golden blonde hair and violet eyes that narrow on Ciel, he is checking him out, sussing him out and mentally doing all sorts of debauchery with him – I can see it behind his eyes and with the way he keeps shifting his position against the wall, he's so easy to read.

The last song dies down and the song I requested starts. It had dawned on me that we would need something sexy enough to grab his attention but also something upbeat so Ciel can keep pace with the beat. I chose Ooh La La from Goldfrapp; like the dress, I think this will do just fine.

As the beat starts to kick in, I saunter over to Ciel, who is now wearing a look of pure confusion on his face. Placing my hand on his shoulder, I lean into him, "are you ready?" I ask, he nods. "Good – follow me and look like you're enjoying yourself." I instruct as I turn him around to face me. I slide my right leg in between his thighs and balance him on my knee slightly as I start to grind into him.

His eye widens at my touch but he allows it as he stumbles for a moment with the movement and stepping on my feet. I bend over towards his ear again as he jerks around nervously.

"Relax, just relax. It's like playing the violin, close your eyes and feel the music." I instruct. He closes his eyes and starts to feel the rhythm and the beat of the song and begins to relax.

I run my hands from his thighs, up to his waist as I press him against me tightly. We start to move in perfect sync as we gyrate and swing our hips to the seductive bass heavy beat. Tipping my head towards his ear, my eyes dart over to Aleister, perfect, he's watching – everyone is watching.

"I'm going to turn you around. Chamber is the blonde on the right, make eye contact with him and keep it there. Nod if you understand." Ciel nods his head to the beat.

My fingers spread across his tiny waist as I pull my leg out and spin him around. My hand crawls from his waist up the sides of his torso, to underneath his arms – lifting them up. Instinctively, Ciel wraps them around my neck, pulling me down towards him. I look over to Aleister, who is fixated on Ciel, who is dancing like he's on fire.

Pushing back into me, he licks his lips and swings his hips as he dances into me. His whole body bobs up and down, rubbing himself against me and maintaining constant focus on Aleister. I start to neck him, lightly kissing the side of his throat and behind his earlobe.

"You've got him, get him." I breathe into his ear as Ciel nods to the beat again and pushes me away from him. I step back and watch him dance – he's perfect, absolutely perfect and captivating as he moves his hands over his head and face, down towards his neck and over his chest and his hips hit each beat with a ferocious, over exaggerated switch. He stretches out his arm towards Aleister and wiggles his finger, beckoning him to come to him.

Aleister acquiesces and comes towards him.

I duck out of the crowd that surrounds them so I can keep my distance but watch over him safely. Ciel is doing wonderfully, he takes to this so quickly and well, he suitably impresses me yet again.

As the song starts to wind down, I turn around to keep my eye on them but they were gone. My eyes scour the room and I can't find them anywhere – this was not a part of the plan and I have now lost both of them.

Shit.

* * *

**Chapter playlist:** Ooh la la – Goldfrapp (Chapter title track)

(Don't Fear) The Reaper from Blue Öyster Cult


	7. Teddy Bears' Picnic

_For Flying Purple Kites – just for being such a brilliant sister…_

**Warning (s):** Dubious consent, drug use, underage drug use, violence… etc.

* * *

'_If you go down in the woods today you're sure of a big surprise_…'

…

Shit.

Shit, shit, shit.

I only turned around for one moment and they are gone. I knew I shouldn't have brought him, I knew it. Shaking my head and clearing my thoughts, I realize that it doesn't matter now, what matters is that I have to find them.

_How can they have just vanished? _

The music is so loud that the bass line drums out any intelligible thought I have on trying to locate them. Abandoning the idea of thinking, I decide to just use my instinct and look for them. It's strange; I feel an actual physical connection to Ciel, like we're bound together. It's as though I can sense him.

I dart through the room and weave past the inebriated guests, scouring the area like a fine toothcomb trying to feel his presence.

Still nothing but I know he's close.

As I move through the room, I turn a corner and find a hallway. People line the walls, leaning against them, listening in to what's going on behind each door and waiting for their turn. I shudder and try to calm my rushing heart beat in order to see if I can use my intuition to see which door Ciel is behind.

"Excuse me sir, what's your pleasure?" An accented, meek voice asks me from behind as a small hand reaches up to touch my shoulder blade, getting my attention.

I look over my shoulder and see a small girl, obviously younger than Ciel or at least made to look that way. She is clad in a tight fitting beaded black bodice top with a puffy black lace skirt, dark brown hair cascades over her shoulders as she hazily stares at me with her large sad green eyes. Without a doubt, this child is drugged.

"Are you a songbird?" I ask and she nods her response, although I could have guessed. "Have you seen Aleister?" She nods again; now we're getting somewhere.

"What's your pleasure?" She parrots as she steps closer to me, running her small hands over my stomach in an attempt to seduce me.

"Aleister, take me to him." I insist. This time, she shakes her head.

"I can't, he's taken someone into the Ecstasy Room, and so he cannot be disturbed." She replies. My heart pounds into my throat, that's where he's taken Ciel.

"What happens in this room?"

"What do you think?" She shrugs with one shoulder.

I can think of so many things which is why I need to get there and quickly. In order to get this girl to take me to them, I think it's time for a different tactic.

"What's your name?" I ask as sweetly as I can with a flirtatious smile as I lean against the wall. She pushes her small body onto mine as she plays with the buttons on my shirt.

"Seven." She coos.

"Seven? That's an interesting name."

"That's what he calls me, I don't... I don't remember what I used to be called." She says coolly. I swear to God, if there is one, I want Aleister to pay for what he's done to these girls.

I gently use my fingers to smooth back some stray strands of hair behind her ear as I bend my head towards her.

"Fine then Seven, that's what I'll call you." She smiles at me.

"Now, what is your pleasure?" She repeats again, nuzzling her face against my chest.

"My pleasure is for you to take me to the Ecstasy Room." I purr as her eyes light up, "Perhaps we can join Aleister?" It was the only thing I could think of to have this girl take me to them.

She dips her head and reluctantly outstretches her arm, guiding me down an empty hallway. We walk past a few closed doors; the sound emitting from each room we pass is loud and familiar, as each room is filled with the sounds of sex and the hall smells of it. There are people rutting against each other and acting without any inhibitions as they behave like animals in heat.

This place is definitely a den of sin.

After a while, Seven stops at what I hope is the Ecstasy Room. Her little balled fist is about to knock on the door but I stop her, holding my hand out to halt her. Her mouth drops open to protest my action but I place my index finger to my lips, shushing her. I put my ears to the door and listen in.

"You should start to relax shortly, my little robin." I hear his voice languidly spill out of his mouth. I'm too late, he's taken whatever is on offer in there.

What do I do? Do I wait until called as agreed or get him now? _Why hasn't he called me? _

No, I'll wait. I decide to wait.

Seven looks at me curiously, as I lean against the door, putting my ear to the wooden panel. I desperately try to listen in to what is being said amongst the sounds of sex and the heavy rhythm that vibrates through the walls and oozes from the floor.

Calming myself down, I'm able focus my hearing on what is going on in the room.

"Relax." That must be Aleister.

"What did you give me?"

"Oh it doesn't matter, only that you'll start to feel good in a moment." His voice is charming as he tries to lure Ciel in.

"What are you doing?"

"Helping you relax. You're so tense little robin." How odious.

"Don't touch me." Ciel hisses.

"Don't be like this. You were into me on the dance floor and it was your idea to come somewhere more private, well, here we are."

"That was then, this now... H- hey, stop it!"

"Come now robin, relax; I'm not going to hurt you."

"_Nn_..." He moans lightly.

"See, you like it when I touch you there, don't you."

_Call me... come on Ciel, call on me._ I think to myself. That was the deal we made before we even set foot into this house, I wouldn't make a move until he calls for me.

"_Nn... Sebastian_." He whimpers and that's all I need.

Taking a step back, I pull out my trusty piece; I'd tucked it away in the waistband of my trousers as we left the house. Seven looks terrified as she watches me wrap my hands around and grip the handle tightly. I draw in a sharp intake of breath as I brace myself and charge towards the door, bashing my shoulder into it and causing it to break open.

There they were.

Aleister was sat on the bed with a very drugged Ciel draped over him like he was cradling a rag doll.

Upon seeing me, Aleister leaps up; throwing his hands high into the air as he lets Ciel tumble almost lifelessly onto the bed, face down. I start to circle around him as I side step towards Ciel, who isn't moving. Looking at him, I'm annoyed with myself that I didn't come in sooner. The hem of his skirt has ridden up and the shoulder straps have been pulled down far enough to expose the rosy rim of his nipples slightly.

"Young master get up." He doesn't stir. "Master, please, we need to get out of here." He moves a little and lets out a little groan. I can see Aleister start to move out of the corner of my eye and whip my head towards him, causing him to freeze. "Ciel Phantomhive, get up!" I bark. Keeping my eyes on Aleister, I watch Ciel move out of the corner of my field of sight. He starts to slowly roll over onto his side, and then slides off the bed to his knees, whining in the process.

"What did you give him?"

"Him?"

"Yes, it's a boy. Now what did you give him?"

"Just a few ecstasy pills to relax, she was so uptight."

"S-Sebastian," Ciel calls out to me, "_I feel_..."

"Hang in there Ciel; I'll be with you in a moment."

"Wait, Ciel... Phantomhive?" He asks incredulously.

"Yes." I confirm.

"No, it's can't be, he's supposed to be dead from that fire, it was all over the news."

"So, you didn't know he was alive then?" I wonder aloud.

If he didn't know, then he couldn't have sanctioned the hit on him last month or is he lying?

"What do you know Chamber?" He looks away; I take a large step towards him and unclick the safety. "What do you know?"

"I don't know anything, only that he was in a fire that killed his parents. That's it, that's all I know." He splutters out, his voice, like his whole body, quaking with fear.

"Who is Nogoyev to you?"

"Nog- _oh shit, no._ Nothing, I am nothing to him."

"You're lying and I don't like liars."

"He deals in children, he was my supplier but he's dead...!"

"I know and you're soon to join him." I grin, this is my favorite part.

"Oh God no!" He squeezes his eyes closed and braces himself for impact. That's just what I like to see. I haven't smelt fresh blood since last month and frankly, I miss the scent.

"N-no Sebastian, don... don't kill him." Ciel weakly calls out to me.

"Oh?"

"Ca-call the police. The girls...I know them." He manages to get out.

Of course, if Aleister, via Nogoyev, purchased the girls then Ciel would have at least seen them. I can't imagine that they were kept in luxury accommodations whilst kept; they would have all been hoarded together.

I nod to acknowledge Ciels' request.

If I get the cops to come, at least these girls would be taken into the system, possibly able to go back to their families and Aleister would pay for his crimes this time, which would give them some kind of justice. It'll also give DCI Spears something to do and leave me alone for a bit.

"Well, you are very lucky as my master wants me to call the police." I smile politely. "You know, if I had my way, I'd torture you, little by little for each of the girls you made suffer." I bend over and grab a hold of his leg. "This will hurt but at least you'll pass out." He looks at me as his body involuntarily shakes under my grip. "Don't worry, I obey my masters' orders implicitly and if he says don't kill you, then I won't kill you. However, we can't have you running away now, can we?" Pushing down on his pelvis and with a sharp yank of his leg at an angle, I dislocate his hip joint, causing him to shriek out in agony. I'm not going to lie, it's no perfumed fragrance of freshly spilt blood but it's ear splitting, curdling and musical, and it satisfies me nonetheless.

After a moment, the searing hot pain that courses through him causes him to finally pass out.

I look around to see Ciel on all fours on the ground, staring back at me, wild eyed and frightened.

"Come now master, we must be off." I smile to try to calm him as I stand and approach him. He backs away from me frantically, digging his back into the side of the bed in an effort to try and escape me. "What's the matter with you?"

"I feel... _my heart..._ it's going to explode."

"It's the ecstasy, you'll be okay, now let's get you home." I bend over and hold my hands out, reaching over to grab him but he slaps me away.

"I trusted you!" He admonishes me. "I almost got... _again, I_..." He tries to get out.

"You can trust me Ciel. You called my name and I came, as promised. Nothing happened to you and nothing ever will again."

"Don't say nothing! He... He touched me."

"He never will again. No one will touch you ever again unless you want them to." I try to pacify him.

"How do you know?" He starts to calm down.

"Because I won't let them."

"Do you promise?" He whispers.

"I swore it on my life when I signed the contract didn't I?"

"That's for the job, I mean actually. Between you and me – do you promise?"

I think for a moment as I try to understand what he was driving at.

"I promise you Ciel, no harm will ever come to you again." I kneel down in front of him and gently stroke the side of his face to calm him. "This is more than a job to me." I soothe. Well what can I say; I think I've grown attached to the little brat over the last few months.

He smiles at me as he falls forward into my arms and I help him up.

…

When we get outside, I quickly call the cops – an anonymous tip off from one of my untraceable pay as you go phones. I then turn my attention to the task in hand. Trying to get a drugged up Ciel to the car is like trying to herd kittens.

He keeps squirming in my arms and trying to dance as I attempt to hold him up as we wait for the valet to bring us our car. The other valets who wolf whistled before leer at us and make lewd comments to each other under their breath. I'm sure Ciel can feel the weight of their stares as he tries to maintain some semblance of dignity by constantly pulling down his dress.

"Why isn't it going down?" He whines.

"That's as far as it is going to go."

"I'm cold." He pouts as he keeps trying to pull his dress down. I remove his arm from my waist and prop him up against the valets' desk. Taking off my suit jacket, I drape it over his nimble shoulders. He encloses it around himself and breathes in the scent from the fabric. "It smells like you." He sighs as he breathes the scent in again. I roll my eyes at the remark, as I know he's going to be a handful tonight.

Finally, the valet returns with our car.

He opens the door for Ciel as I go to the drivers' side and get in. Ciel puts his arms through the sleeves and tries to get in, stumbling around and giggling with each failed attempt. Eventually he falls forward and pulls himself in using the gear stick and the steering wheel. Once in, the valet shuts the door and looks over at me as Ciel slides himself into position. I don't even want to know what he must be thinking but going by the other comments, it'll be nothing but filthy.

I wait for him to fasten his seatbelt, to which he keeps running the strap up and down his chest, feeling it as it moves. Finally, it locks and we set off.

It is relatively quiet for half an hour with Ciel pressing his lips to the window and blowing hot air on to it to write in the condensation. I couldn't make it out because it wasn't actually legible but he continued to do it anyway.

"Put some music on." He demands as he opens the glove box and looks around for the spare cherry lip balm we'd put in there just in case.

"No, I like to drive in silence."

"I want music!"

My head falls back as I roll my eyes back into my skull and I sigh, I'm becoming rather annoyed with this now.

"Why don't you sing something then?" I reply sarcastically.

"I don't know what to sing, I only ever listen to Classical music."

"Nothing you grew up with? Not even nursery rhymes?"

It's quiet as he thinks about something to sing. I look over to see him chew on his freshly balmed lips and twist the curl of his hair in his fingers as he thinks.

"Teddy Bears' Picnic!" He shouts, finally coming up with something.

"Teddy what?"

"_If you go down in the woods today you're sure of a big surprise_…" He starts to slur as he sings loudly. "_If you go down in the woods today you'd better go in disguise… For every bear that ever there was will gather there for certain because – today's the day the Teddy Bears have their picnic_!"

My whole body shudders - that was blood curdling bad.

"Are you done?" _Please be done._

"Aw, com'mon Sebby, why you gotta be like that?"

"Sebby?"

"Yeah, it's a nickname, don't you like it?"

"You can call me whatever you like young master."

"What's your real name?" He inquires, smearing more balm onto his lips.

"As long as our contract is in place, my real name is Sebastian Michaelis."

He crosses his arms over his overly articulated chest and pouts.

"Why do you have to be like that?"

"Be like what young master?"

"I'm having fun, for the first time in, like, ever… why don't you want to have fun with me?"

"Am I not having fun with you?"

"_If you go down in the woods today you're sure of a big surprise_. Sing with me Sebby."

"Ah, no."

He unfastens his seatbelt.

"Young master, please put your seatbelt back on."

"Ah, no." He mimics.

"It's dangerous, please put your seatbelt back on." I request again.

"Ah, no." He imitates again as he starts to move from his seat.

Trying to keep one eye on the road and the other on him, I glance over to seem him moving towards me. He puts both hands on my left thigh and moves his head closer to my face, so close that I can smell the cherry gloss on his lips. I turn my head towards him and he smiles deviously at me.

"_If you… go down in the woods today… you're sure of a big surprise_…" He coos as he sings, this time, his voice is breathy and deep. What is he doing? He seems to be flirting with me but it must be the effects of the drugs.

"Young master, please, sit back down."

"Only if you sing with me."

"No, sit down." I scold, which only makes him pout.

"You're no fun Sebby." He leaves my lap and sits back in his seat.

"I don't pretend to be, now fasten your seat belt."

Ciel fastens his seat belt and crosses his arms in a strop. If I remember the effects of this drug correctly, this is only the tip of the iceberg and I'm going to have to watch him like a hawk tonight.

"How did you learn how to dance like that?" He interrupts my thoughts.

"Before I became a butler, I used to go to clubs."

"Oh." He seems quite thoughtful at that comment. "Do you dance with women?"

"Yes, who else would I dance with?"

"I dunno." He pauses as he chews on his bottom lip; causing the blood to flush and making his lip go red. He rubs the base of his hands on the sides of his stomach. "My palms are sweaty." He complains.

"It's the ecstasy."

Ciel hums and nods.

"Did you…" He starts to run his hands over his whole torso, "Did you like dancing with me?"

"Yes, I thought it was fun. You're quite a good dancer, when you're not stomping on my feet." I muse as I look over to see him rubbing his back against the seat and running his hands over his neck and chest.

"Can we do it again?" He exhales, obviously enjoying the sensation.

"If you wish." I reply, "Although preferably when you're not on drugs – your Aunt would kill me." I smile at him.

"She'd kill me too but she wouldn't if she knew how good this feels."

"It'll wear off soon."

He closes his eyes and pushes himself back deeper into the car seat. He giggles lightly and wraps himself tighter into my jacket.

"So, you like animals?" He wonders aloud as he inhales the scent of the fabric again.

"Only cats." I reply.

"I'm allergic to cats so I had dogs growing up."

"I know." Seeing as though I was named after one.

I pull into the driveway and park the car. Looking over at him, he seems to be still enjoying the sensation of his own hand on his body as he keeps running them up and down himself. Feeling the fabric of his dress, the texture of my jacket and the softness of his own skin.

Walking around to his side, I open the car door and attempt to lift him out. When I think I have a grip on him, he giggles, squirming around in my arms, causing me to hold him close so he doesn't fall out of them.

"Sebby likes cats. _Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty cats_." He purrs as he starts to rub himself against me. "I get it."

"Get what?"

"Why they call you Black Cat."

"Oh?"

"Your hair is black and you dress in black and you like cats." He mutters out as coherently as I think we're going to get tonight.

"Yes, I guess that's true."

"_Meeeeeoooow_." He mewls softly as he nuzzles my shoulder. All of the lights are off which means that his Aunt must still be at work. "_Meow… meow, meow, meow_." He continues as he starts to sensually rub his chest on to mine, his hands grips onto me tightly as he does so.

Walking him down the hallway, I try desperately to ignore his actions. I'm a grown man and no matter what he says, he's not.

Entering his bedroom, I lay him down on his bed and he flops over. His hair brushes over his face, still covering his right eye, his shiny lips part slightly as he breathes out and his dress shift upwards revealing his milky white thighs as he draws his knees upwards.

I have undressed and dressed him many times but now, he looks like pure sin, gift wrapped in silky black and pink satin. There is something about the illusion that is sexy, the playful hint of something naughty rather than having it all on display.

I have to get out of this room and clear my head for a moment. I don't know where my mind is going but I can't let it go too far.

"I shall be right back, I'm going to fetch you some water. You need to stay hydrated." I say before he could respond, I quickly dart out of the room and back down the hall towards the kitchen.

Once I enter the kitchen, I place the palms of my hands on to the cold marble countertop and lean over. What is happening? I don't ever have thoughts of lust or desire; they are hazardous and only cause trouble – which it most definitely would do in this situation. Still, he is flirting with me – although, it is the effect of the drugs and it seems to be having it's own affect on me.

Letting my logic and reasoning finally kick in, I grab a water bottle from the fridge and go back into Ciels' room. He lies motionless on his back and I can't really see his chest rise or fall by breathing.

"Young master, I have some water for you." I call over to him. He doesn't respond – he doesn't even stir. I move closer to him, he really doesn't appear to be breathing. "Master? Are you all right?" Still, nothing.

I lean over him, bringing my face close to his to check and see if I can hear him breathing or at the very least, feel his breath on my skin.

His eyes flutter open and he grabs the knot of my tie with both hands, pulling me closer to him and our lips meet. He breathes out into my mouth; I close my eyes and return his kiss. I couldn't help it, everything about him, his large doe eyes, his mouth, his lips, his taste – all of him is just so inviting. I trace my tongue over his lower lip and he mewls again, so light and musical. I quickly break away.

"What are you doing?" I pant.

"You said that no one would touch me unless I let them? I want you to touch me." He says seriously.

Now, I have a problem.

Before I have the chance to challenge him, he uses all the force he can muster and pulls me back down again. Our lips meet with impact as we kiss.

The air is filled with the light smacking of our lips as they engaging one another. He wraps his slender legs around my waist and I let him. The action causes me to stumble forward slightly and with my left hand dropping the bottle of water to brace myself on the bed and my right moves behind me, sliding back down his calf and creeping up his thigh. He purrs loudly with each gliding stroke of my hand as it goes all the way up the hem of his dress. I feel him, the pads of my fingers stroke the delicate flesh of his thigh as my tongue searches and finds his.

"_S-Sebastian_." He moans softly into my mouth.

I stop.

This is wrong, this is so very wrong. I break away from his lock with an audible pop, remove my hand from underneath his dress and look down at him. His eyes are still closed as he tilts his head upwards with a pout, as he searches for my lips and he whines when he can't find them. Standing upright, his legs unravel from my waist and he lets go of my tie and I pass the water bottle to him, which he takes.

Saying nothing, I leave the room but I know he's watching me, I can feel his eyes on me as I walk through the door. Closing it behind me, I lean against it, shaking my head and trying to calm my thoughts as they raced and my body as I feel electrified. Every nerve ending is alive and burning, my veins are open and blood courses through them at such speed, it's dizzying.

I bow my head and I lick my lips before I touch them with my fingertips. I chuckle softly to myself.

You taste delicious – just like cherry.

* * *

**Authors' Note: **Well that's going to be awkward the next morning...

**Chapter title track:** Teddy Bears' Picnic - John Walter Bratton and Jimmy Kennedy


	8. Roads

'_How can it feel, this wrong? From this moment… how can it feel, this wrong…'_

_..._

I wait by your door all night, I wait and you still don't call on me.

Looking down the hallway, I can see the morning sun starting to rise in the sky; it casts its light through the windows and down the hall towards my weary eyes. I know I wait outside every night wondering if you'll call for me but now, it feels different. Now, I want you to sober up and call me back for another reason – I wish to continue.

These thoughts are new to me and almost foreign. I'm just not that kind of person with ideas of lust but after last night, I have done nothing but try to shake this feeling. It hits me in waves, almost as though my logic and rational mind is battling with my darker side, the side that has earned me the title of demon. It creeps up on me every once in a while and tries to take over me but I fight it. I suppress it and keep it as far down as I possibly can.

However, after last night, it's rising again. I see the way you are, everything has to be neat and immaculate, orderly and just right. I have more than grown accustomed to your way of thinking and I deliver to order, but now? Now, I just want to make a mess out of you. I want to take you, make you mine and break you but I know I have to wait until you're ready – I just have to wait.

As much as I may want it – I don't take. I'm not an idiot, I know it's wrong but I don't know what to do. Do I run? Should I stay? I know I made a mistake, one I don't think I could fix if I tried. No, there's nothing I can do and there is nowhere I can go – I'm contracted to you, bound to you and now I feel stuck. You cornered me, you grabbed me and I caved – I gave into you even though I knew better – I know better than to have these constant thoughts.

Although you enjoyed yourself, you'll think differently in the morning and what will that mean for me? Well, I can pretend as though nothing happened, like you didn't pique my interest. I can act as though I haven't been thinking about you all night, the taste of your lips and the sensation of feeling your skin on my fingertips. I will go back to normal and keep these feelings to myself if that's what you want but what about you? What will you do? Will you even remember and, if so, do you want me to forget? If you do, that's just too bad because I won't and I don't regret it.

As I try to clear my thoughts, Tanaka comes walking towards me.

"Spent the night here again?" He asks me.

I nod, "Yes, you know how he tosses and turns."

"Indeed I do." He smiles as he pauses for a second. "There was such a ruckus last night – you don't happen to know what that was about, do you?"

"Oh, you know, just one of our arguments." I decide that it may be best to be just a little economical with the truth and then I have an idea. "Tanaka, do you think you could take care of the morning preparations for the young master?"

"Of course but-"

"Something has been weighing on my mind and I need to take care of it." I interrupt with a rambling stream of words.

"I understand." He nods.

"Thank you very much Tanaka." I bow slightly and take my leave back towards my room.

Pulling out my pocket watch, I check the time, 6:38am. Okay, I have exactly forty-eight minutes to be out of the house before Ciel wakes up. That's enough time to quickly shower, shave and put on a fresh set of clothes.

I disrobe, putting yesterdays' uniform in my clothes hamper; I quickly dart off into the shower. As I lather and rinse, I let my mind rehearse excuses I could give for leaving the house. I then recall there was something bothering me about last night. It is obvious that Aleister had not ordered the hit on Ciel, but he wasn't completely innocent of some involvement either, so what did he have to do with all of this?

I lean against the cool cream-colored tiles in the shower as I think. There must be a connection there somewhere. Rolling my head from side to side I try to stretch out and relax but I'm far too tense for that.

I realize that I need to see the only person I know that would be able to help me with this question, Undertaker.

…

Going inside, I stand and wait in the foyer.

The place looks almost exactly the same as when I first stepped foot in it, and the darkness still has its shadows that creep up on you like the bogeyman. The hardwood floors are freshly polished and a black carpet runner that goes down the center of the room is vacuumed and pristine. The centerpiece on the wooden table in the center of the room is changed from while calla and stargazer lilies to half opened white roses with white phalaenopsis orchids that proudly poke out of the Victorian styled cream-colored vase.

"Can I help you?" A voice asks me from behind. I turn to see a young man with pasty white skin and sunken eyes glaring back at me.

"I'm looking for Undertaker."

"He's getting ready for a viewing, can I help at all?" He inquires as crosses his arms.

"No, I really need to speak with him, I'll wait."

The young man nods as he makes his way back through to a room concealed by closed curtains.

Taking this time to wander about the room, I make my way over to the wall of coffins. I trail my fingers over the brass handles of one of them, thoroughly fascinated by the design. I have never been to a funeral before; I'm only a cause of them. I wonder what they're like? Widows' faces screwed in anguish, usually hardened men showing a shred of sadness. I'll be honest, the thought of watching such a display entices me – I have never minded being the cause of others pain, and to see it through to it's completion would be quite satisfying.

As I let my mind think about funerals, it hits me – I wonder what the Phantomhive funeral was like? How many people were there? Did anyone mourn? Who were Rachel and Vincent Phantomhive? Who was Ciel before this tragedy unfolded?

"Well, well. Gregory told me you were here." Undertaker cackles as he makes his way into the room. I turn to him and see his eyes are still covered by his long fringe but he is wearing glasses, which he subsequently takes off and sits down on the table.

"Undertaker, good morning." I greet him as he looks around the room.

"And where is the beautiful boy? Didn't feel like bringing him with you today?" He smiles almost ignoring me.

The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end when he mentions Ciel.

"You stay away from my master, I saw how leered at him."

"My, my, you're taking your job very seriously I see."

"And you're nothing more than a predator."

"Is that so? Then what are you?" He grins as he leans against the table, studying me.

"Excuse me?"

"I was at that party kitty, I noticed you were too busy to see me as I watched you with him."

"Oh?"

"Your job is to protect him, doesn't that… _exclude_ you from extra curricular activities?"

My jaw drops open to rebuttal but I don't follow through. I don't know how to reply to that without landing a weighted punch to his face. I'd like to think that my feelings and desires are different from those of Chamber and Undertaker – I'd like to think that but suddenly, I feel unsure.

"I'm different than you." Is all I reply but I'm seething and desperately trying to hide my emotions.

"Me? Well kitty, I like to look, never touch. Besides, the mind is a much better toy than the real thing sometimes." He pauses, as he looks me up and down reading me, drawing his index finger across his chin. "Or maybe not, in your case. It seems to me like you've already had a taste." He caught me, which I know must be showing in my face as he starts to chuckle. "Living up to your demon status – I see. Are you like this with all of your contracts or just the young ones?"

"Cut the shit Undertaker. I need information from you."

"Well that's too bad because I don't work for you, I work for him. At least tell me why you've gone rogue."

"I only have one question today and it's best if Ciel wasn't here."

"My, quick to the punch today, aren't we kitty?"

"Look, you said something the last time we were here. There was a broker?" I say calmly, trying hard not to lose my temper.

"Ah yes, one of the ones who lived."

"Yes."

"Well, you know my fee."

"I don't have time for your games right now." I snap.

"Oh dear, _kitty has claws_." He simpers. "Fine, I'll give you this one for free but next time, pay the fee and bring the boy, I need something to look at aside from your grim mug." He giggles to himself.

I roll my eyes. I may be currently intoxicated with Ciel but I wouldn't do anything to hurt him, unlike the others I see looking at him lecherously. I wish to protect him from anything that comes for him, including myself – if needs be.

"Tell me, the broker who was there that night, at the auction, was he there for Ciel?"

"Of course, your young master was the star attraction of the show."

"Is the broker connected with whomever tried to kill him?

"Well, wouldn't that be telling, wouldn't it? The simple answer to that is yes and no but that's all I currently know."

"What do you mean, yes and no?"

He shrugged. "All I know if there is a group called The Syndicate and they want him dead, however, the broker was working for someone inside of The Syndicate who wanted your master alive for, let's just say less than wholesome reasons. Again – that's all I know. I don't know the ins and outs nor the who – just the why."

"How do you know about the broker?"

"Because kitty, his client still wants the boy." He pauses for a moment as he sets about flitting through the room, straightening the flowers in vases and positioning the tissues in their boxes just right. "The buzz of the underground is that his client is obsessed and will go to great lengths to get him. They treat these kids like collectables, well, until they break them and then they go and get another." He shakes his head.

I started to add everything together - the broker, the client and The Syndicate.

"So The Syndicate sent the hit men the other night."

"Bingo."

"And Aleister had nothing to do with it? You sent us on a wild goose chase?"

"Oh now, I didn't say that, did I?"

"Then…"

"Think about it, what did I say the other day, everything is interconnected. Aleister may not be the client or the one behind the hit but he knows something."

"Okay."

"Now kitty, that's all the free information I'm willing to give and I really must be going. I have another viewing to attend to and as much help as Gregory is, _well_, you understand, you met the lad. Human interaction is not his strong suit."

I nod, my mind whirling with further questions that I knew he wouldn't answer. Instead, I hold my hand out to shake his – to which he just laughs and then disappears into the room behind the curtain.

…

Standing outside upon my return to Ciels', I hesitate before I open the door. I know I can't just walk back into the house; I'll have to be a little more covert about my return, especially as Ciel will probably wonder where I went. I didn't leave a note nor did I tell Tanaka where I was going, I just left. If there were any luck in the world, he wouldn't remember last night, although I want him to.

Taking out my pocket watch, I use my thumb to click it open. 1:11pm, lunchtime, I am back later than I thought I would be. I smooth down my waistcoat and straighten out my suit jacket. Running a hand through my hair, I prepare to enter the house. My hand hovers about the doorknob as I draw in a sharp intake of breath, twist the knob and enter the house.

The first thing I notice is that it's very quiet; perhaps Ciel is taking a nap, which he tends to do after lunch. I make my way through the reception and past the sitting room, which is empty. I walk down the hallway, taking care to avoid the kitchen, and onto his bedroom. The door is closed – it is as I thought, he must be napping. I shall wake him in an hour but first; I need to write down what I've learned from Undertaker.

I walk towards my room as silently as possible and open the door.

The first thing I see is Ciel, he's sprawled out on top of my bed, seemingly fast asleep. He has one arm above his head as the other rests just on his stomach. How could he do this to me? Tempting me without realizing it. Lying on my bed, he looks completely charming and innocent – I swallow hard as I want him more than anything. I just want to corrupt him, to blacken his already darkened soul and make it mine. However, sense gets the better of me and I start to back out of the room, desperately trying not to make a sound.

"Sebastian." He calls over to me with his eye still closed.

"Yes young master?" I smile, unsure if he can see me or not.

"Where were you?" He asks as he starts to stir, stretching out and rolling onto his side, still not looking at me.

"I had to run some errands." I had to get away from you.

"Why didn't you just wait for me, I would have come too." Because I wanted to go alone, I needed some distance between us.

"I went to see Undertaker about the other night."

"And?" Ciel yawns as he starts to sit upright; his legs dangle over the side of the bed.

"All he could tell me was that the group after you is called The Syndicate. Does that ring any bells?" He shakes his head.

"We'll have to do some further research into who may be members and why they're trying to kill me."

"Master, I believe that those who are after you now may be the ones who killed your parents."

"I don't doubt that." His voice was a low rumble, an almost growl.

"I will do further research and let you know of my findings." I smile again.

He hums at my comment and slides himself forwards on the edge of the bed. I must be in the clear about last night, either he doesn't remember or he's choosing not to bring it up – at this moment in time, both instances are all right by me.

"You know, I should punish you for your disgusting behavior last night." He spits. I was wrong I can try shirking it off but I think I might have a little fun with this instead.

"Punish me for what?"

"You know what?" He hisses.

"So you remember what happened last night?" I raise an eyebrow.

"Barely." He admits.

That's just what I wanted to hear.

"Then what do you remember?" I ask tentatively, unsure of where the night ended for him. He folds his arms in a huff and leans back slightly.

"I remember the dancing, your hands were all over me – it was positively foul. I then remember dancing with Aleister and the next thing I know I wake up this morning, sick and alone in my own bed – still dressed in that horrible dress. What happened last night?"

What do I say? I'm not allowed to lie. Do I tell him the truth? That he tried to seduce me? That he sang in the car, his voice was breathy and sexy. Or should I just skip to the part where he grabbed me by my tie and kissed me? Perhaps none of those things but I must tell him some sort of truth.

"Aleister drugged you, that's why you can't remember most of the night." I state truthfully.

"Drugged?" He parrots back, almost in complete disbelief. "Wh–what happened?" I can see him start to shake, he must have been drugged before, and the experience of blacking out may not be new to him. I go over to him and kneel down in front of him as his eye averts my gaze. I need to ease the tension in the room.

"Nothing happened to you young master, in fact, you assaulted me." I taunt playfully.

"I what?"

"You assaulted me. You sang to me in the car and it was terrible." I joke, I say joke – for the most part it was horrendous.

"Wa-was that all I did?"

I shook my head, "No, you kept meowing and rubbing yourself against me when I carried you to bed."

"I did no such thing!" His cheeks flush as he tries to protest. His naïve behavior is utterly adorable.

"Oh young master, I'm afraid you did."

"Why didn't you stop me?"

My bottom lip protrudes as I mock pout. "And where would be the fun in that?"

"Sebastian!" He looks at me almost pleadingly.

"I'm sorry young master, next time, I'll stop you."

"There won't be a next time."

"You're right, there won't."

"Anything else?"

I decide that I am not going to tell him the rest, I won't lie, I'll just omit the truth – that way I can save him whatever embarrassment he may have and hopefully, our relationship will stay the way that it is.

"I said to you that no one will ever touch you again without your permission." He blinks at me curiously. "Because of Aleister, I promised you that only you can decide who touches you and I will enforce it." My tone is cool but serious.

"Did I give you permission to touch me?"

I nod. "You did."

"Fine, then I revoke your right. You are not aloud to touch me any more." He states firmly.

"But then how am I meant to dress you?" I joke lightly. He opens his legs and scoots to the side, crossing them.

"Aside from your daily duties, you are not to touch me. Understood?"

My heart sinks a little but I suppose I knew this was coming, even if he doesn't remember, I do and it really is for the best. I will have to learn to keep some kind of distance between us before this gets out of hand.

So, instead of letting my feelings of disappointment show, I decide to remain stoic, placing my right hand over my heart as I tip forward slightly.

"Of course, master." I keep my face as serious as possible.

I then look down to see the expression on Ciels' face, I don't think I'll forget it as long as this contract is in place; it is a look of haughty derisiveness with a sly, devious smile.

"Sebastian," He begins and looks up at me. "I'm going to make your life a living hell from here on out."

And don't I believe it.

…

**Chapter song lyric and title:** Portishead – Roads


	9. I Will Possess Your Heart

'_How I wish you could see the potential, the potential of you and me._

_It's like a book elegantly bound but in a language that you can't read just yet…'_

…

"Why do I have to go to school?" Ciel whines as he sits on top of his bed, almost kicking me as he fidgets constantly, and nervously shakes his legs.

I kneel down in front of him, wrapping a black and white stripped tie around his neck and tying it into a neat Windsor knot.

"It's the law, young master." I work the knot up to the base of his throat.

"That's never stopped my mother before. Especially as I was always sick."

"Well, I am not your mother and both of your Aunts want you to go to school. Besides, you don't seem sick now and you don't have much of a choice here."

"No, I suppose not."

I finally get the knot up at his throat and straighten it out, taking care to smooth out the edges of his collar as I feel two eyes studying me. I glance up and my eyes meet with a vibrant blue and a murky grey. I smile at him and his face does the oddest thing, his cheeks go from pale porcelain white to a flushed rogue.

"Is anything the matter young master?" I ask coyly, as I wonder why he's blushing.

"No, nothing." He mumbles, and then averts his eyes, looking towards the clock on his nightstand. "Hurry up, Elizabeth and Aunt Francis will be here shortly. God knows what Aunt Francis will do if I'm late on my first day." He exhales loudly.

I nod as I stand to my feet and walk over to his dresser. Opening it, I pull out a charcoal grey, v-neck cardigan and shake out its folds. Ciel holds his arms out so that I may slip the sleeves over his thin arms, and I button it around his slender torso, tucking the tail end of his tie into the dip of the sweater.

Once I finish dressing him, Ciel slides off of the bed and stands in front of me, I take his black suit blazer from the hanger and put it on him, finishing off his ensemble.

"You look very sharp young master." I compliment.

"Do you think so?" He wonders as he inspects himself in the mirror. I can see that he is nervous, I notice his hands shaking slightly and the heavy sighs he exhales when he thinks I'm not looking. I want to touch him, hold him and tell him that everything will be fine but instead I look for his black silk eye patch and attempt to shake off my overwhelming desire to comfort him.

Finding the eye patch on the desktop near by, I pick it up and move towards Ciel, standing just behind him as he still faces the mirror, pulling down his blazer. My long arms reach around him and I have to stop myself from embracing him and drawing him into me. Instead, I step into him, his small frame just resting into my chest as I delicately place the patch over his right eye. He holds it steady as I take the strings and loop them together behind his head, putting them in a knotted bow.

When I finish, I don't move but then again, neither does he; we just stand there in the silence for a moment, until the doorbell rings out – breaking my perfect peace. Ciels' eye lights up and he quickly darts around the room looking for his book bag, which is on the bed. Grabbing it, he bolts out of the room and I follow behind him.

Making our way into the hallway, I can hear the childish squeals of his cousin and the stern voice of his Aunt Francis scolding her as his other Aunt, Anne – as Dr. Durless now prefers to be called – chuckles at the apparent display. Just before turning the corner towards the sitting room, Ciel stops and steadies himself against the wall, taking in a deep breath to calm himself. Finally, he holds his head up high and marches straight into the room.

"Ciiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeellllll!" His cousin calls out to him just before she pounces him, sending him back slightly. "How cute do you look in your uniform?" She coos as he holds him out at arms length to get a good look at him. They are dressed almost the same, although, instead of the black slacks, she is wearing a black pleated skirt that falls just below her knees.

"T-thank you Elizabeth."

Her face scrunches up, "Ciel, how many times? Please, call me Lizzie." She insists.

"Oh, you both look so adorable." Anne enthuses as she picks up her digital camera from the side table. Sweeping her ruby red fringe from her forehead and waving her hand at them to move them closer together, Lizzie and Ciel pose for a picture. Lizzie grabs onto Ciels' right arm tightly and beams brightly as Ciel has his typical sullen look on his face.

I stand aside and watch them as Anne sighs and tries to get Ciel to smile, much to no avail. Francis walks over and stands next to me, facing the trio with her characteristically stern look on her face.

"You look more appropriate today butler." She speaks softly but firmly.

"Thank you Mrs. Midford, I took your advice and made myself appear less… _indecent_." In truth, all I did was slick my hair back with water and it is only for her benefit as well. Once it dries, it'll all fall back into its normal place anyway.

"I must say, Ciel seems to have flourished – I have noticed a marked change in his behavior. No doubt thanks to you."

"I haven't done anything accept to tend to the young master." I smile.

"Well, no matter, he's different."

I can't say that I have noticed, in fact his behavior seems to have gotten progressively worse – especially towards me. It has been a month since he vowed to make my life hell and he has held up to his end of the bargain.

Little does he realize that just being next to me is hell enough for me. I thought that over time my infatuation with him would fade but it's only gotten worse, as our bond grows stronger and I do nothing more than think about that night repeatedly in my mind.

Curiously, my need to protect him and my desire to have him go hand in hand. I may be young myself but there are many things in this world I do understand – especially when it comes to lust. Just because I recognize that he intoxicates me and draws out the monster within me doesn't guarantee that I won't hurt him. However, it also brings out my desire to protect him, I have to protect him from me. Especially as all I want to do is tear him apart, see him from the inside and devour him but I don't. I just wait for him to want me as much as I want him.

"Sebastian, why don't you come and stand next to them?" Anne beckons me to come over to them.

"Oh, no Dr. Durless that's quite all right, it's a family photo."

She stands with her hands on her hips, "Come now, you've been with Ciel for the last year, you're just like family to him and to me – which is all the more reason to be in this picture." She insists.

Family? What an interesting concept. Especially as I am the furthest thing from it in Ciels' eyes – I am his dog, his protector and not his family. However, with the way he looks over at me with that haughty little look in his eye, I know that my being in this picture will annoy him immensely.

"Fine, as long as Mrs. Midford joins me as well." I concede. Well, if I can, why not annoy two birds with one stone?

"Marvelous! Francis, you stand behind Lizzie and Sebastian behind Ciel."

Both Ciel and Francis shoot me a look that if it could kill, I'd be a corpse cold in the ground. However, despite the cold glares, we walk over to the pair and take our places behind them. Anne holds her camera to her face and bends down slightly.

"Okay everyone, bright smiles!"

I look over to Francis who has a weary smile on her lips; Lizzie is beaming as she was before and Ciel, _well,_ Ciel is Ciel. I smile; I suppose that this is what you do in pictures – although, I will admit, this is my first one.

Anne furrows her brow as she waits for Ciel to smile – finally giving up, she counts us down to the click but just before she lands on one, I reach around and hook my index finger into Ciels' mouth, pulling the side into a slanted smile. He tries to jerk away from me but Lizzie clutches onto his arm tightly, completely amused by my action and Anne takes the picture.

"Perfect!" She declares as I unhook Ciel. "Excellent work Sebastian, I'm going to frame this." She titters as Lizzie rushes over to her to see it.

"Oh Ciel, you look so cute!"

"I doubt that." He scowls as he tilts his head upwards to look at me. I know I'm going to pay for that but it was worth it.

"Come on, enough dilly dallying, it's time to go." Francis, still un-amused, starts to shuffle the kids out of the door.

"Don't forget that I'm going to be home tonight for our special dinner." Anne calls after them and Ciel nods as he grabs his book bag and walks out of the door, shutting it behind him. "Right, I better head off to the hospital." She winks at me as she heads towards the hallway.

Anne is an interesting woman.

She is someone I probably would have fallen for, in a previous life. Anne is tall, slender and stunning. Although she is much older than I am, she maintains her youthful looks without looking tucked or pulled. An avid socialite, she is rarely home, and when she's not at work she's always at one party or another – except now.

Over the last few months she has been spending more and more time at home and with Ciel. This is not a bad thing but ever since the night of Ciels' birthday several months ago, when she was adamant that he should not follow in his fathers' footsteps, she has been keeping a closer eye on him. It wasn't that she doesn't trust me, she does, she just thinks her constant presence will give him the life he deserves not the one he is destined for.

However, with all of her effort, Ciel sees through it. He knows what she's trying to do and he challenges her. He isn't cold towards her as he conducts his business through me, using me as a point of contact and having me fetch and carry – which I do diligently. However, he can be short with her on occasion.

Anne doesn't notice that he is short with her, and that this is how he manages to do business; he still maintains his rule over the underground with me as his lap dog. She doesn't suspect me but, then again, no one suspects the butler.

With that all being said, she has revealed a recent development in her life, a boyfriend. Between work, parties and hovering over Ciel like a helicopter, she manages to have a social life. Which is why tonight is important for her, it's the first time Ciel is going to meet him.

I know what she's thinking, if he is mister right, then Ciel can have a complete family again – she's the closest thing to a mother he has now and perhaps this new man would be willing to be a father? Who knows, this is just speculation on my part but I'm hardly ever wrong – especially when it comes to looking after Ciel.

…

It is the middle of the afternoon and I'm bored.

There isn't anything for me to do, Ciel should be leaving school soon, escorted by the Midfords' driver and I have already taken care of the afternoon tea preparations. Homemade Lavender scones with fresh clotted cream and a variety of preserves, all served with a light Earl Grey tea. The house is already thoroughly cleaned and dusted and Tanaka is out getting the last of the shopping for tonight.

Walking into the sitting room, I spy the piano. I haven't played it since Ciels' birthday, which is so long ago now. Going over to it, I lift the lid and sit down on the bench. I have few pleasures in this life and music is one of them. I don't remember how I learned or why, I just remember knowing how to play.

My past is a mystery to me; I don't remember my parents or my life before them. All I remember is that I learned how to kill at fourteen and I went from there. I know that that may sound young but it's how I learned how to survive. I became a professional at sixteen and managed to make a name for myself. Ask me how I started and I would tell you that I answered an ad and that's all I can remember – now I'm here.

Long fingers dangle delicately over the ivory keys as I take in a deep breath to center myself. Placing them down, I begin to play, Gnossienne No. 1 by Erik Satie, the first song I ever learned how to play in full. Its haunting melody starts off lightly but fills the empty house as I play affettuoso.

I close my eyes as I enjoy the feel of the keys under my fingertips, this part of the song must be played pianissimo. How I enjoy the sound as it fills my ears and clears my thoughts as I play.

"I like to listen to you play, you should play more often." Ciel whispers to me as he sits beside me on the bench, his back to the keys. I continue to play, repeating the song from the beginning.

"How was your first day of school?"

"Wretched." He replies through gritted teeth. I just nod and hum in acknowledgement, trying not to chuckle at his little pout. "Why can't I continue to be home schooled?"

"You should give it a few more days before you throw in the towel." I smile; I open my eyes into little slits as I observe him. He nods in agreement and slides closer to me, just barely touching me.

"If it doesn't work out, would you tutor me?" He inquires.

"I can but I'm strict." I warn, albeit half-heartedly.

"I don't mind."

"Trust me, you will." I warn again, this time, firmer. "What is it about going to school that you don't like?"

"The people, they're horrible."

"Yeah, I think I can understand that, I'm not much of a people person myself."

There is a long silence between us as I continue to play. The beauty of this song is that it can be played over and over and it will sound seamless. Ciel just sits and listens, yawning everyone once in a while but remaining awake. It's calm and peaceful as he gently sways to the music, tapping me ever so slightly as he does. The contact sends shivers up my spine and down into my fingers as my skin is electrified; it's such a wonderful feeling.

"Sebastian?" He interrupts our peace. "Why don't you ever tell me about your past?"

"Why don't you ever tell me about yours?" I retort.

"Sorry?"

"I know you have those nightmare every night and it must have something to do about you being kidnapped but you don't tell me anything about them or what happened to you before I found you."

"I don't – I can't really remember." He confesses as his head drops.

"Well, do you at least remember your parents?"

"Yes."

"Do you miss them?"

"_Yes_." He exhales as though a weight was lifted from his shoulders. It is as though he has kept that inside him all this time and finally, he is able to admit his feelings.

"It's OK to miss them young master. It doesn't make you weak or childish to miss your mum and dad." I speak softly, trying to comfort him.

"Do you – do you miss your parents?"

I haven't thought about them in years, I can't say that I do, I don't even know what happened to them but that's not what he wants me to say right now.

"Yes, I suppose I do miss them." I guess that's true. I miss the idea of them, the idea of what parents are to a child. In a way, I respect what his Aunt Anne is trying to do. It is almost as though a child isn't complete without their family – it gives them a sense of belonging. I never belonged, not anywhere but I made my home in the shadows and that is where I stayed.

Ciel yawns again, snapping me out of my thoughts. I stop playing and turn to him.

"Why did you stop?" He asks me tiredly, his eyelid batting slowly as he struggles to keep it open.

"Because you look tired, come on, lets get you to bed for a quick kip."

"Kip?" Ah, yes, I forgot colloquialisms were lost on him.

"A nap young master, you have a busy evening tonight. Your Aunt has invited her boyfriend over for dinner, remember?"

"Oh God that." He groans. "Well, I suppose you're right. I should, _er_, kip as you call it." He slides off the bench and makes his way out of the room.

I get up from the bench and pull down the lid of the piano. I lean against the mahogany wood and smile to myself. Ciel, I wish you would tell me more about what has happened to you. Every time I get close, you pull away. I can't help but wonder what demons haunt you, which ones possess and take hold of you, especially at night. I want to know so much but you give me so little. I want to be the demon controlling you, who possess you.

I do like a challenge and you are certainly that.

Chuckling quietly, I move away from the piano and head out of the sitting room and towards the kitchen, I take out my silver pocket watch to check the time. It's getting late and I have dinner preparations to attend to.

* * *

**Chapter title track and lyric** – Death Cab For Cutie – I Will Possess Your Heart

Erik Satie – Gnossienne No. 1

**Piano terminology:**

Affettuoso – An indication to perform the music _affectionately_ or "tenderly".

Pianissimo – This instructs the performer to play very softly.


	10. Nightmare

'_I will protect you, I will defend - so it never gets you… ever again…'_

…

Ciel went to his room for his nap.

I set to work on doing the preparations for the dinner party. Tonight's dinner, a duck confit with an Asian pear compote with various complimentary side dishes. I'm surprised, taking into account the complexity of this dish, that I have mastered it as though I have been a Chef du Cuisine at a top Michelin starred restaurant for most of my adult life. I won't lie; I'm quite impressed with myself - and how far I have actually come along – from adding vinegar to scrabbled eggs to now, not bad work.

With that said, I didn't intend on making such a sophisticated dish because at first I thought tonight was something simple, a small dinner for three. However, Dr. Durless being the avid social butterfly that she is has invited several others.

Luckily, I have met some of them before, as they are associates of the Phantomhive Family. They come around every so often and I see them as irregular fixtures, much to my young masters' chagrin. He would much prefer not to mix business with pleasure but their impromptu comings and goings make it less of a pleasure and more of a hassle.

Although, I must say, anything that irritates him gives me immense pleasure. Just to see his face scrunch up in annoyance – simply delightful.

Once I complete the dinner preparations, I pull out my pocket watch to check the time and note that it's six fifteen. Ciel has been asleep for nearly three hours, that can't be good – I had better wake him, as he'll probably not get any sleep later on tonight.

I meander down the hallway, towards his room. Just as I am about to knock on his door, I hear something – low moaning and faint sounds of whimpering. Do I enter? _What should I do?_ Pressing my ear against the door, I listen intently to what is happening on the other side. It's obvious he is having a nightmare, but this seems different to the others he has had before. This one seems gruesome and violent, as I hear his body thrash about the bed. Normally, I would wait patiently for him to call me, even though I know he never will. So this time, I decide that I'm going in. I feel like I have to calm him, to get him to settle.

Straightening myself up, I turn the handle and partly open the door.

It is just as I thought; he is having a terrible nightmare.

Ciel lies there, tangled in a mess of sheets, tossing and turning. His mouth parts as he exasperatedly pants and whines in his sleep. Shutting the door behind me, I slowly make my way over to him. I don't know how to approach this, as I'm sure you're not meant to just wake someone having a nightmare – or is that a sleepwalker? I'm unsure but I do know that either way, I have to be careful.

"_Young master_?" I whisper. No response. He just turns to his side with his back to me. He clutches his pillow tightly as his body writhes and contracts, how I would love to be the cause of this beautiful display of moaning and breathlessness, but I can't think about that now. "_Young master, you're having a bad dream_." I try once more and again, nothing. Bending over and reaching out, I gently touch his shoulder, "_Young master_?"

Gasping, Ciels' eyes fly open as he whirls around on to his back gripping something tightly in his hands. My own eyes narrow as they stare down the barrel of a gun.

From the gun, my eyes flick up to Ciel, who is wide eyed and shaking as he holds the weapon to my face. It's almost as though he doesn't recognize me as he frantically scoots himself against the headboard, trembling like a leaf in the wind.

I attempt to approach him. "Young-"

"Stay where you are!" He threatens as he unclicks the safety. This has just gotten very real as I try to steady my heart and my pulse, trying to remain perfectly still. Normally in this situation, I would start to plan out my attack and the assailant wouldn't last long but I can't do that in this instance, and so I try to stay calm.

He must still be asleep or at least, his mind is. My hands slowly creep up in the air and I hold them there, showing him that I'm not a threat.

"Please, Ciel, you had a nightmare." I try to reason with him, watching his chest rise and fall with each labored breath. He blinks a few times as he apparently starts to recognize me and then starts to lower the weapon.

"_Se-Sebastian_?" He breathes.

"Yes young master, it's me."

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to check on you, you were having a bad dream." I try and keep my voice as composed and soothing as possible. He lowers the gun completely, unconsciously clicks on the safety, and sits it down on the mattress. Once he's done that, I feel comfortable enough to bring my arms down, just as slowly as they went up.

Ciel shakes his head from side to side as he composes himself.

"What time is it?" He wonders aloud, not really speaking to me but looking for his clock on the nearby nightstand. He reads the clock face and looks over to the piece on the mattress, then over to me.

"Forgive me for asking but what was your dream about?"

"My parents' death." He replies coolly. I motion to sit down beside him and he nods. Sitting down, I don't face him, as I know that he doesn't dare share any glimpse of weakness in front of me. So, instead, I just keep my face forward, staring blankly at his desk.

I want to tell him that his nightmares will pass, as his fears are unnecessary and that was the past. As per our contract, I have sworn to protect him no matter what – I've put my own life on it. Anything that curses him, haunts him and takes over his sub-conscious, it's all for naught as nothing will ever happen to him again. I will take care of him; ease his pain and his anguish – only to make it my own.

Normally, I wouldn't breach the subject but I want to know what happened. Is this the time to finally ask him? Will he tell me? I wonder.

"What happened that night? I only ask because it might give me some insight into who's done this."

"What do you mean?"

I don't want to tell him the whole truth, which is basically my morbid fascination in what happened, but I do have another reason in mind. My secondary reason is that I may be able to get some kind of clue on who did this from how he was kidnapped.

"Well, sometimes, assassins do things in a certain way – we are ritualistic creatures, it's never just about the kill."

"Then what is it about?"

"The thrill of the hunt, stalking the quarry – the kill is incidental, really. It marks the end."

"I see." He pauses as he ruminates over my words, his fingers tapping lightly on his thighs. "Then what does that have to do with knowing the details?"

"Because we our bound by our rituals, each of us has a... _way_ of doing things. Like leaving a calling card. If you've been in this business long enough, you get to know other peoples' rituals."

"Rituals." He repeats softly as he takes it all in.

"Some like to cut off hair, some collect blood samples others might chop the body into pieces and neatly lay them out. It all depends." I stop for a moment as I think about what I have read about the Phantomhive case.

What I know is that there was only one single bullet entry in the head for both Vincent and Rachel; nothing further could be deduced because their bodies were burned in the fire. Their son was presumed dead, although a body could not be found at the scene. I guess that's all I know. It's hard to tell whose ritual that could have been, the fire could have been anyone and the way of the kill, hell, it could have even been me.

I didn't want to say this to Ciel, but whoever did it couldn't have just broken in, no, they knew the family well enough to get into the mansion. I know for sure that a Family like the Phantomhives would have had the very best in security, and a random break-in and robbery would have been an almost impossible feat to achieve. So someone would have had to be able to get in close without anyone thinking twice about their presence.

All I can reason is that someone close to them must have betrayed them, but who?

Ciel thinks for a moment, chewing on his lower lip as he reflects on the events of that night.

"I don't really remember what happened. All I can remember is that I walked in to the room after smelling burning and I saw them, both already dead, their bodies just laying there on the ground. There were flames everywhere, and I kept coughing because of the smoke. Then someone came up behind me, covering my mouth with something and I was suffocated. The next thing I knew was that I was awake in a cage."

"Well, that's not really much to go on but it helps." I smile as I try to comfort him. Normally, I would feel compelled to gently tap his knee but per his instructions to not touch him, I don't. I just lace my fingers together and I place them on my lap. "Don't worry, eventually, you will remember."

"I'm not worried, I know that I will. When I do, I'll tell you everything – especially if it'll help in getting my revenge."

"Is this really what you want? Revenge?" I ask.

His head sharply turns to me as he scowls.

"Of course it is." He barks.

"I understand that, naturally, it's something you would want but it won't bring your childhood back, it won't bring your parents back."

"Don't you think I know that? Once something is truly gone, you can never get it back." He seethes through gritted teeth. "The need for revenge is a funny thing, it won't bring back the dead nor will it bring them happiness. I don't seek revenge on behalf of the Phantomhive Family or for my parents… I am doing this for myself. I want to find the people responsible for what happened and I want them to experience the same pain and humiliation that I have suffered."

"I understand-"

"No, I don't think you do. This isn't a simple need for revenge, it's a choice. It's something I've freely chosen and it's still my choice to make – not anyone else's. I don't regret my decision and I won't be coddled by anyone – not by my Aunt or especially you." He growls as though he's almost feral; his fists are tightly balled in his lap and his gaze forward, unblinking.

How I still admire him.

This choice is so foolish and yet it's what makes me desire him, it's what makes me crave him like a drug. His words are like an injection burning through my veins, I need his yearning and I need his hatred – it all helps me function, it makes me want to help him realize his desire and, as importantly, gives me a focus. He can have a better life than this, he can move on and attempt to be normal, but he turns his back on it. Moving ever forward towards the darkness, towards me.

How I want him to realize that he needs me, he needs me as much as I need him because he can't do this alone.

...

As Ciel stretches and begins to fully wake up, he dismisses me and I set about completing the final touches for tonight.

Twenty minutes later and everything is ready for the dinner party.

The house is immaculate, the silver polished, and the food cooked to perfection. I even had a little time to decorate the townhouse in Ciels' favorite white roses, putting little vases with bouquets amongst the crimson red fixtures for color contrast. I take a step back and admire my handiwork, this place looks so beautiful, if I don't say so myself. I think in the last year, I've come a long way.

"It's very beautiful Sebastian, you have out done yourself." Anne compliments me as she walks up to me from behind.

"Thank you Dr. Durless." I bow politely as I start to get ready for her guests to arrive.

"Sebastian?"

"Yes?"

"Who are you?" She asks.

"I don't understand the question."

"Okay, let me try again. Who is Sebastian Michaelis?"

"I am what my master says that I am." I reply with a slight smile. I'm trying to be charming but she doesn't seem to be buying it as she crosses her arms and stares at me.

"You put on a good show but you're not a butler, so who are you? Are you even a body guard?"

I don't really know how to answer that but I quickly think of something.

"I can assure you madam, that whatever I am, I am here to protect the young master." She takes a step forward towards me, arching an eyebrow as she looks at me suspiciously.

"How do I know you wouldn't do anything to hurt him? How do I know you're not one of the ones responsible for all this?"

"Excuse me?" That accusation dumbfounds me.

"Well it all seems, shall we say, very convenient, you showing up and finding him. How do I know that you weren't involved in some way the whole time?"

"Because he's not." Ciel interrupts as he walks into the room.

He has a very dry smile on his lips as he finishes tying his black silk eye patch over his eye and leans against the nearby couch. Anne turns to him, watching how casual he is, just perching himself against the armrest.

"Ciel darling, be reasonable. I don't know anything about this man and-"

"Yet you have let him live with me for a year now. Where is this coming from?" He brusquely cuts her off, and folds his arms across his chest.

"Yes, well, that was because you were under my roof and I could keep an eye on you, but now the reconstruction and refurbishment of Phantomhive manor is complete, I suspect you'll want to move back home. How can I watch over you there?"

"The manor is complete?" His voice quivers slightly and I wonder why.

"Yes but-"

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I was going to tell you after dinner this evening." She pauses as she watches his face fall and then walks over to him. Anne swoops on top of him, gathering his lithe little body in her protective arms and holds him tightly. "I don't want you to go, you're all I have left." She breathes.

"And attacking Sebastian is how you planned on keeping me?"

"No, it's just that I don't think you need him anymore."

Ciel uses whatever strength he can muster and pushes her off of him

"What?"

"Well, he served a purpose this last year, in order to help your recovery, you needed him but it's been a year and you're well now so-"

"So?"

"So, don't you think it's time that he leaves?"

"Dr. Durless, I don't know what I can say to put your mind at ease, but I can assure you – I will stop at nothing to protect Ciel, I swear on my life." I try to calm her. I don't know what she's thinking but I can see her face soften. "If the young master chooses to move back to the manor, I will ensure that he is more than just taken care of."

"That's not the point Sebastian." She snaps, "The point is I can provide him with a proper family."

"Is that what this is about? Family? I hate to disappoint you but I already have a _family_, I run it and as for Sebastian, he stays. So if you'll please keep your delusions of a makeshift happy home to yourself."

"Ciel, please!" She begs. "You're much to young to take up this life. Your father wouldn't want-"

"Don't treat me like a child." He snarls.

"You _are_ a child."

"I am no more a child than Sebastian is a butler and my reasons to take up this life – as you put it – are my own."

"_Ciel_?" Her voice cracks as she tries to choke down the tears that are starting to form.

It is obvious that she is getting emotional but Ciel seems unmoved. He simply sits upright and refolds his arms across his chest as he stares at her. His face is blank letting his closed off body language speak for him.

"My parents were murdered for a reason and I know that if I come back as family head, then my mere presence will be a nuisance to the people who hunted them and killed them, kidnapped me and kept me like an animal. I know that they'll come for me and that's exactly what I'm waiting for. Someday, quite possibly soon, they'll show their hand and make their move."

"I don't understand."

"What I mean Aunt Anne, is that someday, they'll come to kill me too. To correct their mistake."

"What was their mistake?" Her voice is shaky. She doesn't want to hear her darling nephew speak like this but she can't help but ask.

"Their mistake, simply put, is that they let me live."

"But why Ciel? Why do this?"

"Tell me, what is the alternative? To grieve? To sit here and feel sorry for myself? Or to just move on? No. I choose none of those options. I am alive and I'm standing on my own two feet. I know I'm going to die someday; I'd just rather die without any regrets."

As Anne tries to absorb what she's just heard, she staggers back, bracing herself on the nearby side table. She looks over to me, as though I should offer a piece of advice or comfort, however, what she doesn't realize is that this is also what drives me. I am feeding off of his hate and I am more than sated right now but, unfortunately for her, I won't stop him because his hatred is so delicious that I want so much more.

"Then what are you planning? Some grand revenge?" She asks, turning back towards him.

Ciel shakes his head. "No. This is no grand revenge – it's just a game and I'm waiting to see who will make the next move."

"Sebastian, how in good faith can you let him do this?"

I shrug at her question as I go over to Ciel and stand right behind him.

"I have no control over what my master chooses to do as I am merely his pawn, there to be moved however he sees fit." I reply. Ciel emits a smug sigh to that response as though it were an inside joke that only he and I knew about. Anne looks at the both of us, she seems completely confused and visibly fighting back her urge to either cry or scream and shout.

Before she can do either, the doorbell rings out.

I turn my head towards the sound but they stay facing each other.

"Your guests are here, you should answer the door, _madam_." Ciel says coldly as he moves away from the couch.

"We're not done here." She calls after him. Ciel stops and looks over his shoulder at her.

"Oh, I think we are. Come Sebastian." Smiling, I bow slightly to Anne as I follow behind him.

"Yes, young master."

* * *

**Chapter song and lyric** – Band of Skulls – Nightmare


End file.
